Every year, on Thursday during the third week in March, I do something at work that a lot of people would probably consider rather bizarre. Sitting at my desk, I construct a chain of 52 paper clips and hang it from a hook on the side of my cabinet. Like a kid anticipating Christmas, I remove one each subsequent Thursday throughout the year, arriving at today, when I get to take down the final link in the chain, and toss it into the drawer with it's brothers.
In addition to some compulsion that I should probably discuss with a mental health professional, this ritual should convey exactly how much I love the WCHA Final Five.
Last year at this time, I ran down why this is the greatest weekend of the year, and my personal memories of this tourney. Since I wrote that, my favorite team win another tournament title in riveting fashion, and we all found out that college hockey's best league (and postseason tournament) has an expiration date. Suffice to say, none of that has made this weekend hasn't smaller in my mind. To the contrary in fact, because after what seems like an eternity, the Minnesota Golden Gophers have finally returned. And as any opposing fan will tell you, things are always a bit bigger when they're involved.
First off, a bit of housekeeping for the Maroon-clad masses: The Xcel Energy Center is located in St. Paul, Minnesota at the corner of Kellog Blvd and West 7th St. We know it's been awhile since you've had occasion to make the trip, so here are some handy directions from Mariucci Arena, which we know (most of) you are able to find. Safe travels, and we'll see you at the game!
But that's the last ribbing you'll get out of me, because frankly I've always been really lousy at talking trash. Always end up getting far more steamed than the opposition, probably because they're just having fun and I'm taking it seriously. In any case, it's hard to have much in the way of bravado when you always expect to lose. In fact the superstitious side of me feels it's bad karma to get haughty before a game, so forget I even brought this up.
But you do have to admit, it's been a weird couple of years. To go from a stretch of time when I started attending Final Fives and the Gophers kept breaking my heart, to back-to-back years when they weren't even present? Well that was just downright odd. Not that us North Dakota fans minded of course, winning has a way of making you ignore those formalities. It'd be like the Twins winning a playoff series and being pissed that they didn't play the Yankees, just take the 'W' and move on.
So here we are on the cusp of a new chapter, and things couldn't have worked out better. Sure, NoDak could've found it's way into 3rd place, saving the showdown for Saturday night, but at this point Friday will work just fine. The slate of teams couldn't be better, with the league's top four teams, local drawing card St. Cloud, and the appearance of the much-maligned Michigan Tech Huskies for only the second time in the last decade. The Tech pep band (official band of the Final Five) always does a nice job in St. Paul, even with the team sitting at home in Houghton, can't wait to see what they bust out now that they're also making the trip.
I could go on and on about how great this weekend is going to be (provided we beat St. Cloud on Thursday night, you've gotta gimme that, COME ON!), but again, there's really not much to say that wasn't in the post from last year. What did strike me though, was what if I had to distill it down to the ten things I most loved about this weekend, what would that list look like?
So away we go...
1) March Madness coinciding
At this point, you're probably saying "Duh", and it's true that the opening weekend of the Madness is a totally obvious choice that millions of people love, but you still have to marvel at the timing. The fact that these two events are intertwined throughout the same weekend is just marvelous, and insures that you will not have minute one of boredom from 11 AM until midnight. One weekend before or after, and this doesn't happen, it's quite serendipitous. Makes me feel like I did something right in a past life or something. Of course the rest of the Minnesota sports scene feels like punishment for being a Stalin-esque dictator, so perhaps there's nothing to that.
2) St. Patrick's Day coinciding
Again, duh, but it's just another piece of the puzzle that needs to be considered by any fool who'd try to stack another weekend up against this one. It's true that sometimes the crowds can get unwieldy, particularly when the weather doesn't cooperate. But in general, the presence of St. Paul's huge St. Paddy's crowds bring in another great element (not to mention scantily-clad women) and push things to the next level. Last year was a might aggressive, since it fell on Thursday, and that's a rough way to start your weekend. If this weekend is a marathon, then kicking it off with St. Patrick's Day is like a marathon with a plastic bag over your head; maybe you can do it, but it won't be pleasant and you might just perish on the way. I'm also not a huge fan of the Friday STP Day experience, since leaving for the 2 PM semifinal always costs you hard-fought bar real estate that can never be recaptured.
This year it's on Saturday, which is perfect. Sure you won't feel like popping out of bed and beelining it for McGovern's at 8 AM to lock down tables after two days spent F-5ing yourself (which would also be rather aggressive given the 7 PM game time), but the holiday does provide a nice excuse to drink off your hangover without pesky thoughts of alcoholism creeping in. After all, who doesn't drink on St. Paddy's? Squares, that's who, and I could never be a square, cause I like to get a-Round!
My advice? Take a more leisurely tack. A little breakfast at one of the fine establishments on Cathedral Hill, couple of cocktails to ease that feeling of nails being pounded into your forehead, and a nice stroll down to West 7th when you feel ready to re-enter the fray. The weather this year will be perfect, both for the walk, and ensuring a hospitable conditions in the many outdoor tents scattered across the city. Erin go Bragh.
3) Alary's
It's a bar, check it out.
4) Carnage
This one might seem a tad more mean-spirited and dangerous, but three days of heavy drinking brings with it the promise of some epic physical comedy.
Some things I feel bad for laughing at, like the time a friend related the story of a man being knocked unconcisous by a vehicle (and losing his shoes!) on West 7th, then walking away as if nothing had happened. Picked up his cell conversation right where he left off and everything. Of course, I don't feel bad enough about it to keep from laughing.
Some things I don't feel bad for laughing about, just regret that I didn't see them in person. Like the buddy who tried to slide down one of the railings at the arena, made it about two feet, then unintentionally dismounted on his head in a rather indelicate fashion.
Some things I did see, and laugh when recalling to this day. Like another member of the group who was two steps in front of me descending a flight of stairs, lost his balance when he turned to make a smartass comment and went face first into a brick wall, opening up a cosmetic, but hilarious (and very visible at work on Monday) gash on his forehead.
Some things will forever be unexplained. Like another buddy who disappeared for hours one evening, the returned hours later with his face covered in mud and a couple broken ribs. I would pay $200 to learn the tale of his evening, but alas, it's forever lost to us, just another piece of Final Five lore. Don't feel too bad for broken ribs guy either, because he witnessed the railing thing, and laughs uproariously every time he re-tells it.
The moral of the story, you know those funny video shows they used to have on TV and still play once in awhile at bars? Some of that stuff looks like it might be painful, right? But you laugh all the same, because carnage is hilarious? Well, this is just that in real life. I'll tell you one thing though, it always strikes me as ironic whenever I see a kid wearing a bike helmet after this weekend, perhaps we should take a cue.
5) Eagle St. Grille
When I read stuff online about people making Final Five plans, a lot of great bars get tossed out: McGovern's, Reid's, The Liffey. But this one, my particular favorite, is absent from most conversations. Perhaps that's because it's the closest to the arena, and usually fairly hopping, if not outright packed, but it's been a staple of our trips since day one and has witnessed more great Final Five moments than anywhere. ESG started with the Xcel Center, as just a little shoebox of a place with a single bar and one-person bathrooms. Since then, it's slowly morphed into a true gem of a bar, acquiring neighboring space on it's slow march to occupy the better part of a city block. The staff is great, the food is great, the patio is great, the owners are the kind of people you want to see succeed and obviously, the location kicks ass.
You might be saying "Come on, it's just a bar". But when you're fighting you're way through a throng of patrons, make eye contact with a bartender across a line 10 people deep, and receive your beverage in an unspoken transaction that took mere moments? Well then, you are not at a bar my friend, you're home.
6) The people
From the excellent crew of buddies that shows up, to the old college friends you bump into, to the out-of-town fans you strike up conversations with, this is just a fantastic collection of great people. Not that there aren't plenty of other good groups out there, but for my money, you can't beat hockey fans.
7) The shots
Of course, nothing helps grease the skids on forging new friendships like a few drinks. While it's often been said that you shouldn't need alcohol to have a good time, I'd like to think that you don't know how good a time you could potentially be having if you're not drinking alcohol. There's a tipping point to each day of festivities, and it's usually about 10 minutes after the phrase "Let's have a shot". The official shots of the Final Five are Irish Car Bombs (St. Paddy's) and Rumpleminze (otherwise).
Car Bombs you've probably had, they taste like chocolate milk, and were most likely invented to "soothe" young Irish children when they were being too rambunctious late in the evening. Rumplemize is a simpler spirit, it's basically the Fourth Reich. A minty draught that ends with a kick resembling rubbing alcohol, I can only imagine how many combined bathtubs across Germany it takes to churn out a steady supply of the stuff. If you're confused as to why we actually drink it, well so am I, but that doesn't mean I'm passing...especially if you're buying.
8) The pics
One member of our group is quite the photog, and Final Five picture reviews, both before and after the event, are an absolute staple. The process of dawning realization that accompanies seeing yourself in a photo is truly priceless. It's a sort of "when were we, wait a minute, oh yeah!" feeling that both amuses and makes you pause to consider what else might've happened that you're not totally clear on.
9) The numbers game
Sometimes, a matchup of teams just isn't that intriguing, but in that event, we've got the perfect fallback plan, it's called Numbers (or The Clock Game, according to some people). The concept is simple, you have a group of people, at max 10, and assign them each a number. When there's a stoppage in play, the person with the number corresponding to the seconds shown on the clock (meaning if 4:35 remains, the person with '5' wins) receives a dollar from everyone else. Goals on your number pay double, OT game-winners are $5 apiece, and penalties mean you own everyone a buck. Sometimes, you come up a person or two short, but that is easily remedied by having everyone throw a dollar to the pot, which is paid out at the next goal.
It's quite simple really, but always entertaining. With all the whistles in a hockey game, the sums of money changing hands can actually get quite substantial. Better than winning though, is conning your opponents out of thier winnings, which happens whenever they fail to notice they won before the puck drops on the next faceoff. Since the players have typically known each other over a period of years, they know just what conversation topics to strike up that will distract the winner long enough to screw him out of his dough. One particularly unfortunate friend of ours likes both soccer and drag racing, so one question about Manchester United will result in him going on a tangent that doesn't end until everyone busts out laughing because the clock just re-started. Point being, if someone starts acting interested in something they typically mock you for, you're being set up. Works more often than you'd think.
10) The hockey
Because that's pretty sweet too!
Showing posts with label Final Five. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Final Five. Show all posts
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Game called on account of hangover
Has it really been a week since I posted? Time gets lost when you step into Planet St. Paul. I'd like to start with a poem I wrote, inspired by my drive to work this morning:
Oh this winter has been such a b*tch
Like your car sliding into a ditch
The commutes have continued to blow
F*cking snow, f*cking snow, f*cking snow
Last week we got highs in the forties
Now the cold's grabbing us by the shorties
I should start driving south and just go
F*cking snow, f*cking snow, f*cking snow
When we finally hit April
And the spring finally seems to be here
There'll be one more kick in the nuts
Forcing you to bust out winter gear
One more year like this one and I'm movin
Can you blame us for the heavy boozin
Twins had better be good is all I know
F*cking Wild, f*cking Wolves, f*cking Gophs
Finally got a little something in the win column last weekend. Although that's all it is, just a little something, and nothing compared to a much bigger something I'm hoping to get in a few weeks time. But at least the Sioux won the Final Five, and for one night restored a bit of hope to these proceedings. Gopher fans, I don't know what to tell you, except that I might soon be joining you with nothing left to root for. And if it happens this weekend, oh I'll be bitter then. I'll walk around saying things like "Good thing baseball season is here, nice having something you get to invest six months in following daily before it all goes down in flames. Maybe we'll even get three more postseason games out of the deal, superb."
Because it's going to suck pretty bad if this year's Sioux team doesn't win the title, but it's going to be an f'n tragedy if they blow the the chance to win it in St. Paul. Now I know that the Gopher fans can say they've been there the last few years, but it's not quite the same. Missing the tourney entirely when you had home ice a-brewin is not quite the same of fumbling a chance to play at home for the title when you're the #1 team in the country. The Sioux are closer and have a real shot. I say this not to be a slang term for a rooster, just to convey how big an opportunity this would be to squander.
So the weekend was a blast. People slid down and fell over rails, mysteriously disappeared then reappeared hours later, hilariously captioned pictures, trashed supermarket aisles, surfed on hay bales, suffered light-to-moderate injuries, acquired a ton of cool flair, busted many a bracket, met old acquaintances, made new friends, coined a phrase or two and consumed mass quantities of cocktails. Most importantly, I laughed longer and harder than I had over any weekend in recent memory.
Some of that laughter was due to moderate-to-heavy drinking. In fact it's kind of funny how light-to-moderate injuries go hand in hand with moderate-to-heavy drinking. It's also worth noting that light-to-moderate injuries also inspire a good deal of laughter in their own right, which is pretty much to be expected. I mean you wouldn't laugh at a serious injury, like a car accident, but a moderate one? Like slipping on some stairs and landing on your ass? Well there's nothing wrong with getting a chuckle out of that. Interestingly enough, this whole situation makes for a nice rule of thumb when people are wondering what constitutes excessive drinking: If you suffer a moderate injury, you were drinking heavily. If you suffer a serious one, your drinking was most likely in excess.
All of that was a roundabout segue to tell you that the Big Ten Hockey Conference sucks. Because Monday I got the news that after two more seasons, the Gophers and Badgers will be leaving the WCHA and the Final Five will be no more. This whole thing is like someone gave me a dog, I had him for years, then one day they told me he was being put down in two years, regardless of circumstance. Two more Final Fives before the WCHA carts it's tourney to Denver and barely draws flies? Two more years until the Gophers start playing half their games in the Eastern timezone and only see in-state rivals on occasion? Pardon me guys, but this seems like a really lousy idea.
None of the Gopher fans I know, and they number many, see this as a good change. Sure there are six Big Ten teams playing hockey, big whoop, putting them in the same league is a dumb idea. Just because Penn St. gets a big donation and waves a magic wand over it's club team, we're going to break up the best college hockey conference in America? Maybe some of the folks talking are correct, and the clout of the Big Ten Network will lead to scores of new hockey fans and an tsunami of cash rolling over the conference members...but I doubt it.
Because as badly as those of us who count ourselves fans would like to see millions of people embrace hockey coast to coast, it's just not going to happen. This Big Ten situation reminds me of the wave of NHL relocations and expansions to southern markets in the '90s. Historic franchises were uprooted, conferences changed names(bring back Campbell and Wales!) and realigned, rivalries were crushed, and for what? So that the sport could find itself worse off than when it began the process, wandering the wilderness of Versus with teams on the brink of bankruptcy? The powers that be keep trying to make the game something that it's not, and in their quest to "grow the game", usually end up destroying something the current fans love about it. Change is inevitable, but change should be about progress. Watering down a good sport by thinning the talent pool with teams no one cares about? Not my idea of progress. Quality over quantity as the saying goes. Remember I said this when the Gophers are beating Illinois 11-2 during the 2018 Big Ten hockey tourney.
Now I know it's a done deal, so I'll stop railing at the wind here in a moment, but this whole situation is another unfortunate reminder of hockey's tendency to be it's own worst enemy. As I've said before, the games is a niche sport, and as such needs to take care of it's most devoted fans first. College hockey is in this vein even more so, as many times the only option for seeing the game is actually going to the arena. You can't write this off as the ramblings of a bitter Sioux fan who's worried is team will get left behind, but trust me when I say that has nothing to do with it. One only had to go to St. Paul this weekend to see that Sioux Nation isn't going anywhere. It's more about 7 PM games being replaced by 6 PM games, about Gophers-Duluth being replaced by Gophers-Ohio St, the whole thing seems wrong. But it's happening, hope it doesn't play out like the pros, or ten years from now you'll need a ham radio to pick up a game of Big Ten puck.
*******************************************************************************
Switching gears here, a funny thing happened this year and I managed to pick a reasonably good bracket. Don't get me wrong, I fully expect it to come crashing down at any moment, but entering the round of 16, I have all my Final Four teams and six of my Elite Eight left alive. Rarefied air for this cat.
Random chance had a rougher go of things however, but just to prove how random this tourney actually is, let's look at the results of the coinflip bracket by region:
East - Perfect bracket thusfar, I **** you not. Sure Ohio St, Kentucky and North Carolina were on a lot of boards, but Marquette taking out Syracuse? Scoring this region, I thought I'd found my new method, but things tailed off just a bit, as you'll see.
West - Hit 5 of 8 games in the first round, pretty solid. Had Penn St. beating San Diego St, not great, but not so bad with the Final Four team (UConn) still in play. Texas is the problem here, for the coin liked them over Duke and that's obviously not going to happen. Still, all in all, if UConn makes the Four, call this one a success.
Southwest - It's here where things really went South (pun intended) for Mr. Chance. Vandy to the Sweet 16, yikes. Purdue to the Final 4, ouch. Purdue winning the title, EGAD! Florida St over Notre Dame was a nice pick though. Moving on.
Southeast - All Sweet 16 teams dead, no chance for anymore points from this bracket, and Mr. Voltin, please report to the winner's circle.
But what does any of this really prove? That I have a slightly better head for college basketball than the one on a quarter? That this whole thing should spawn a new theory about picking games in a blind draw for seeds 4-13, then using your brain from there? Or just that March Madness is exactly the crapshoot we thought it was, and trying to act as if you know something is total BS? I think it's the last one, just Google "Jay Bilas rips VCU" or watch the end of the Butler-Pitt game again if you think otherwise.
Speaking of that fateful game, something happened last weekend which I can't get out of my mind, and that's odd because it didn't happen to me. A guy I know, who incidentally reads this rag (and who I must apologize to for continually bringing it up, can't help myself!) lost an 8-game NCAA parlay on that Pitt meltdown. It intrigues me to put myself in that position, just to wonder what I'd do? Start bawling openly? Curse God and existence? Homocide? Self-immolation? Frankly I don't think anything is out of the question.
But hey, I'd probably never be there, because I'd never have the stones to lay the bet. A couple of seasons picking NFL games against the spread will make you gun-shy. I won a 3-game football parlay once that paid 5-to-1, and was in heaven. That was 5 years and many losses ago. So there's really no telling what would happen. But fortunately my buddy is calmer and more well-adjusted than me (who isn't really?) so he shrugged and took it in stride. Very admirable. I should learn something from that. But instead, I'd probably still end up looked like the guy on the Rage Against the Machine cover (the burning monk on the self-titles album you idiots, not the little kid on Evil Empire).
Here's wishing you continued Madness.
Oh this winter has been such a b*tch
Like your car sliding into a ditch
The commutes have continued to blow
F*cking snow, f*cking snow, f*cking snow
Last week we got highs in the forties
Now the cold's grabbing us by the shorties
I should start driving south and just go
F*cking snow, f*cking snow, f*cking snow
When we finally hit April
And the spring finally seems to be here
There'll be one more kick in the nuts
Forcing you to bust out winter gear
One more year like this one and I'm movin
Can you blame us for the heavy boozin
Twins had better be good is all I know
F*cking Wild, f*cking Wolves, f*cking Gophs
Finally got a little something in the win column last weekend. Although that's all it is, just a little something, and nothing compared to a much bigger something I'm hoping to get in a few weeks time. But at least the Sioux won the Final Five, and for one night restored a bit of hope to these proceedings. Gopher fans, I don't know what to tell you, except that I might soon be joining you with nothing left to root for. And if it happens this weekend, oh I'll be bitter then. I'll walk around saying things like "Good thing baseball season is here, nice having something you get to invest six months in following daily before it all goes down in flames. Maybe we'll even get three more postseason games out of the deal, superb."
Because it's going to suck pretty bad if this year's Sioux team doesn't win the title, but it's going to be an f'n tragedy if they blow the the chance to win it in St. Paul. Now I know that the Gopher fans can say they've been there the last few years, but it's not quite the same. Missing the tourney entirely when you had home ice a-brewin is not quite the same of fumbling a chance to play at home for the title when you're the #1 team in the country. The Sioux are closer and have a real shot. I say this not to be a slang term for a rooster, just to convey how big an opportunity this would be to squander.
So the weekend was a blast. People slid down and fell over rails, mysteriously disappeared then reappeared hours later, hilariously captioned pictures, trashed supermarket aisles, surfed on hay bales, suffered light-to-moderate injuries, acquired a ton of cool flair, busted many a bracket, met old acquaintances, made new friends, coined a phrase or two and consumed mass quantities of cocktails. Most importantly, I laughed longer and harder than I had over any weekend in recent memory.
Some of that laughter was due to moderate-to-heavy drinking. In fact it's kind of funny how light-to-moderate injuries go hand in hand with moderate-to-heavy drinking. It's also worth noting that light-to-moderate injuries also inspire a good deal of laughter in their own right, which is pretty much to be expected. I mean you wouldn't laugh at a serious injury, like a car accident, but a moderate one? Like slipping on some stairs and landing on your ass? Well there's nothing wrong with getting a chuckle out of that. Interestingly enough, this whole situation makes for a nice rule of thumb when people are wondering what constitutes excessive drinking: If you suffer a moderate injury, you were drinking heavily. If you suffer a serious one, your drinking was most likely in excess.
All of that was a roundabout segue to tell you that the Big Ten Hockey Conference sucks. Because Monday I got the news that after two more seasons, the Gophers and Badgers will be leaving the WCHA and the Final Five will be no more. This whole thing is like someone gave me a dog, I had him for years, then one day they told me he was being put down in two years, regardless of circumstance. Two more Final Fives before the WCHA carts it's tourney to Denver and barely draws flies? Two more years until the Gophers start playing half their games in the Eastern timezone and only see in-state rivals on occasion? Pardon me guys, but this seems like a really lousy idea.
None of the Gopher fans I know, and they number many, see this as a good change. Sure there are six Big Ten teams playing hockey, big whoop, putting them in the same league is a dumb idea. Just because Penn St. gets a big donation and waves a magic wand over it's club team, we're going to break up the best college hockey conference in America? Maybe some of the folks talking are correct, and the clout of the Big Ten Network will lead to scores of new hockey fans and an tsunami of cash rolling over the conference members...but I doubt it.
Because as badly as those of us who count ourselves fans would like to see millions of people embrace hockey coast to coast, it's just not going to happen. This Big Ten situation reminds me of the wave of NHL relocations and expansions to southern markets in the '90s. Historic franchises were uprooted, conferences changed names(bring back Campbell and Wales!) and realigned, rivalries were crushed, and for what? So that the sport could find itself worse off than when it began the process, wandering the wilderness of Versus with teams on the brink of bankruptcy? The powers that be keep trying to make the game something that it's not, and in their quest to "grow the game", usually end up destroying something the current fans love about it. Change is inevitable, but change should be about progress. Watering down a good sport by thinning the talent pool with teams no one cares about? Not my idea of progress. Quality over quantity as the saying goes. Remember I said this when the Gophers are beating Illinois 11-2 during the 2018 Big Ten hockey tourney.
Now I know it's a done deal, so I'll stop railing at the wind here in a moment, but this whole situation is another unfortunate reminder of hockey's tendency to be it's own worst enemy. As I've said before, the games is a niche sport, and as such needs to take care of it's most devoted fans first. College hockey is in this vein even more so, as many times the only option for seeing the game is actually going to the arena. You can't write this off as the ramblings of a bitter Sioux fan who's worried is team will get left behind, but trust me when I say that has nothing to do with it. One only had to go to St. Paul this weekend to see that Sioux Nation isn't going anywhere. It's more about 7 PM games being replaced by 6 PM games, about Gophers-Duluth being replaced by Gophers-Ohio St, the whole thing seems wrong. But it's happening, hope it doesn't play out like the pros, or ten years from now you'll need a ham radio to pick up a game of Big Ten puck.
*******************************************************************************
Switching gears here, a funny thing happened this year and I managed to pick a reasonably good bracket. Don't get me wrong, I fully expect it to come crashing down at any moment, but entering the round of 16, I have all my Final Four teams and six of my Elite Eight left alive. Rarefied air for this cat.
Random chance had a rougher go of things however, but just to prove how random this tourney actually is, let's look at the results of the coinflip bracket by region:
East - Perfect bracket thusfar, I **** you not. Sure Ohio St, Kentucky and North Carolina were on a lot of boards, but Marquette taking out Syracuse? Scoring this region, I thought I'd found my new method, but things tailed off just a bit, as you'll see.
West - Hit 5 of 8 games in the first round, pretty solid. Had Penn St. beating San Diego St, not great, but not so bad with the Final Four team (UConn) still in play. Texas is the problem here, for the coin liked them over Duke and that's obviously not going to happen. Still, all in all, if UConn makes the Four, call this one a success.
Southwest - It's here where things really went South (pun intended) for Mr. Chance. Vandy to the Sweet 16, yikes. Purdue to the Final 4, ouch. Purdue winning the title, EGAD! Florida St over Notre Dame was a nice pick though. Moving on.
Southeast - All Sweet 16 teams dead, no chance for anymore points from this bracket, and Mr. Voltin, please report to the winner's circle.
But what does any of this really prove? That I have a slightly better head for college basketball than the one on a quarter? That this whole thing should spawn a new theory about picking games in a blind draw for seeds 4-13, then using your brain from there? Or just that March Madness is exactly the crapshoot we thought it was, and trying to act as if you know something is total BS? I think it's the last one, just Google "Jay Bilas rips VCU" or watch the end of the Butler-Pitt game again if you think otherwise.
Speaking of that fateful game, something happened last weekend which I can't get out of my mind, and that's odd because it didn't happen to me. A guy I know, who incidentally reads this rag (and who I must apologize to for continually bringing it up, can't help myself!) lost an 8-game NCAA parlay on that Pitt meltdown. It intrigues me to put myself in that position, just to wonder what I'd do? Start bawling openly? Curse God and existence? Homocide? Self-immolation? Frankly I don't think anything is out of the question.
But hey, I'd probably never be there, because I'd never have the stones to lay the bet. A couple of seasons picking NFL games against the spread will make you gun-shy. I won a 3-game football parlay once that paid 5-to-1, and was in heaven. That was 5 years and many losses ago. So there's really no telling what would happen. But fortunately my buddy is calmer and more well-adjusted than me (who isn't really?) so he shrugged and took it in stride. Very admirable. I should learn something from that. But instead, I'd probably still end up looked like the guy on the Rage Against the Machine cover (the burning monk on the self-titles album you idiots, not the little kid on Evil Empire).
Here's wishing you continued Madness.
Monday, March 14, 2011
The Final Five
Today was supposed to be a day of great anticipation. This Monday marks the beginning of the week that culminates in the greatest sports weekend of the year. Unfortunately, a lot of that enthusiasm is gone, following the unceremonious exit of the Golden Gophers in two games at the hands of Alaska-Anchorage.
Last July, when the news of another early departure shook the Gopher hockey program, I opined on how far things had fallen the past few years. Since then, as another disappointing season unfolded, my feelings haven't changed. While I definitely don't want to see Minnesota back on top of the college hockey heap, the lack of their presence at the league tourney takes some of the wind out of it's sails. Never is that felt more keenly than a day like today, instead of eager anticipation, many of my compatriots and stuck lamenting what went wrong. I'm not going to let it affect my mood, as my team is still scheduled for Friday night at the X, and I'm extremely fired up. It's just that events are always more fun when people are fired up and attendance is solid, the more buzz the merrier.
So instead of a Thursday night game and potential showdown with the Sioux looming, Gopher fans get to spend today wondering how they've managed to sink lower still. As I wrote last week, Anchorage is not a good team. They may have played well this past weekend, and gotten some phenomenal goaltending, but they're still an 8th place team with a losing record. Minnesota can, has and should've blown them off the ice. Or at least pushed it to a third game. Or at a minimum looked interested in participating on Saturday! Instead, they followed up a poor effort on Friday with one that was even worse on Saturday. The issues facing the team have been re-hashed ad nauseum over the past few years, and it's happening enough places right now that I don't need to belabor it here. Let me just say that although we don't see eye to eye, I feel your pain Gopher fans, and hope this thing gets back to respectability soon.
But enough of that negativity, because as I've mentioned several times, the best sports weekend of the year starts this Thursday!!!
My personal Top 5:
1) Final Five/March Madness - In a class by itself, due to the nonstop action it offers. Do-or-die hoops action starts at 11 AM and runs until midnight, with a constant stream of clutch moments throughout. 48 games hammered out in 96 hours, whittling the 64 tourney teams down to 16 by Sunday evening. But March Madness is only the backdrop for things, and although it's the greatest backdrop one could wish for, it's secondary to the live action on the ice. Toss in 5 hockey games over the course of 3 days and, at least in a typical year, one of America's best St. Patrick's Day celebrations...well you had me at hello.
2) NFL opening weekend/college football/MLB pennant races - I probably rate this higher than some, due to my love of football. But when you have the most popular league in America kicking off the day after you get your first dose of big time college matchups (following the first weekend's slate of cupcakes in tune-up games, and have important baseball games happening to boot? Well that's one heck of a weekend!
3) The Masters/MLB return/NHL crunch time/Frozen Four - If you're not a golf fan, that's unfortunate, because the Master's is a great event that serves as the signal spring has finally arrived each year. It typically coincides with one of the first weekends of baseball season, either the last regular season/first playoff weekend in the NHL and college hockey's Frozen Four. Pretty darn good slate there when it all comes together, and kind of the bridge between the seasons in this part of the world. Sure NHL season won't technically be over for another 8 weeks, but psychologically you're moving on down the road.
4) Final weekend in October - Tipoff of the NBA intersecting with baseball playoffs makes this the only time all year that the 4 major sports are happening at the same time.
5) Thanksgiving - Okay, so sports aren't the first thing that spring to mind when you think Thanksgiving, but with the staggered NFL schedule, the college basketball and hockey tourneys, NBA and NHL throwing out their best matchups and a full slate of crucial college football games, it definitely makes the cut. Used to be neck-and-neck in this slot with NFL Draft weekend (playoff hockey, early-season baseball, etc.), but then they moved the draft to Thursday night and screwed everything up.
So there it is, the best of them all starts in only a few short days, and I couldn't be more excited. Started attending this tourney a few years ago, and if it's up to me, will never miss it.
Some personal memories:
2003
The Final Five: Colorado College, Duluth, Mankato, Minnesota, North Dakota
Highlight: Not much for me, as the only game I attended was the unceremonious 2-1 bouncing of the Sioux by the Duluth Bulldogs. About the only thing I remember about it was thinking it was the emptiest I'd ever seen the Xcel Center. I guess this is the part where I'm supposed to note that I regret missing Mankato's only appearance in the tourney since I've been attending. I'm not losing too much sleep.
2004
The Final Five: Anchorage(!), Colorado College, Duluth, Mankato, Minnesota, North Dakota
Highlight: Also only made it to one game this time out, but it was an amazing one that made me a fan of this tourney for life. Won't rehash that all again, just repeat it was one of the best games I've ever seen. I'll always remember getting the call that there was an extra ticket and catching a ride down with a buddy. His girlfriend (now wife) gave us a ride, and when we hopped out of the car, I manage to kick a toy that was in the backseat onto West 7th. I picked up what I thought was all of said toy, but apparently lost some piece of it.
This would seem a trivial and forgettable episode, but for the fact it caused me to get branded for the rest of my days as "the guy who kicked my son's toy into the street". Not a good moniker to carry, as bad as being "that drunk guy who pissed on the floor", which I've also been on a couple of occasions. Not proud of that. Of course I am not "that drunk guy who took a header down the stairs at McGovern's and opened up a bloody gash on his forehead", that was my aforementioned pal Jud, about two hours after his Gophers won the title, good times.
2005
The Final Five: Colorado College, Denver, Minnesota, North Dakota, Wisconsin
Highlight: You know in soccer, when a guy scores a goal, then goes running full speed and slides along the ground while celebrating? I've determined that it also works quite well on the carpeting at the X. North Dakota was battling for it's tourney life during the Thursday night play-in game against Wisconsin. As luck would have it, this particular Thursday also coincided with St. Paddy's, and I'd been celebrating since the AM hours. The Sioux scored a huge third period goal to take the lead and the Mexican Soccer Slide was born. I came to rest at the feet of two St. Paul cops, who were more than a bit amused with my celebration. Not wanting to get into any line of questioning about how much I'd had to drink that day, I simply hopped up, said "Huge goal" and went back to the business of spectating. The tourney ended with a dull 1-0 Denver victory over Colorado College in the championship game, but will always be remembered as my first year attending every game.
2006
The Final Five: Duluth, Minnesota, North Dakota, St. Cloud, Wisconsin
Highlight: This was the first time I got to see the Sioux win this tourney, an impressive feat for a team that had finished 5th in the conference and having something of a down season. That championship was somewhat overshadowed by another game that, while I wouldn't call it one of the best I've seen played, would certainly rank among the most entertaining. St. Cloud was a .500 team during the 2005-06 season, that found itself up against league champion Minnesota in the Friday night semifinal. What ensued was a wild and crazy affair that included 15 goals, a 3-goal comeback by the Gophers, which included tallies with under a second left in the 2nd period and 15 seconds remaining to force OT in the 3rd. Just when you thought St. Cloud was done, they popped the OT winner past my all-time favorite Gopher, Jeff Frazee, and moved on to meet Nodak in the Finals. Hilarious because it led directly to our buddy Andy f-bombing Frazee in front of his dad at next year's tourney.
2007
The Final Five: Michigan Tech, Minnesota, North Dakota, St. Cloud, Wisconsin
Highlight: Tech sighting! Typically, the only representation Tech has at the Final Five is it's excellent band, they're the ones dressed in yellow-and-black striped overall. (Quick sidenote, while sitting in a suite during 2006, our group pioneered the "invite the entire band into the suite to play a tune" craze that has become common at this tourney. The idea came from a wily Xcel employee who thought it would be funny to sneak the band in as a surprise to an extremely hungover member of the entourage during Saturday's third-place game. Turns out it was hilarious and a tradition was born that got brought back every year. But like anything else, people saw it and it spawned a gang of imitators. Just know it was not your idea.) If memory serves, this was also the year when my buddy Scott saw a man get struck by vehicle, another championship classic.
Scott was minding his own business, talking on the phone out in front of the Liffey, when a guy stepped out into the street and got SMOKED, losing his shoes and cell phone in the process. Scott and others rushed over to see if the gent was still breathing, but after a couple of unconscious minutes, he popped up, retrieved his phone and picked up the conversation right where he'd left off. This is the kind of thing you absolutely kill yourself for missing when you hear the story, could've crossed something off the bucket list and I was 30 yards away! Missed opportunities.
Oh yeah, there was also a g championship game that year, some guy named Wheeler scored
2008
The Final Five: Colorado College, Denver, Minnesota, North Dakota, St. Cloud
Highlight: This year's tourney was all about Minnesota. The Gophers entered the playoffs as a bubble team, played an epic three-game series on the road at Mankato (total of 5 OT periods in 3 games, and the classic "everyone in this building is standing, except for the folks in wheelchairs" quote from Doug Woog), beat St. Cloud in a 3-2 play-in thriller (for which I was seated on the glass) and beat CC in OT, before giving Denver all they could handle in a 2-1 championship loss. The Sioux fell to Denver in the semifinals, which I believe was their 581st consecutive Final Five loss to the Pioneers. Or perhaps it just seemed that way.
2009
The Final Five: Denver, Duluth, Minnesota, North Dakota, Wisconsin
Highlight: Duluth becomes the first team to win the title from the play-in game, ousting Minnesota, North Dakota and Denver along the way. Uber-hot goaltender Alex Stalock allows one goal in three games, pitching shutouts in the last two. My brother came to the tourney this year, and we scared him so bad that he hasn't been back since. At least that's what I think.
2010
The Final Five: Denver, Duluth, North Dakota, St. Cloud, Wisconsin
Highlight: The first non-Gopher year I ever experienced, and sadly not the last, the atmosphere wasn't quite on par with past seasons. But things were great on the ice, as the Sioux finally hand Denver it's first ever loss in a Final Five at the Xcel, with a 4-3 victory in the Friday night semifinal. I believe the streak got to 10 games, meaning the Pioneers had won five tourney titles in the last decade without a single blemish on their record. Of course they missed the tourney entirely a few times, as noted previously, but still a huge monkey to get rid of. Other highlight of the weekend was touring Target Field that Saturday. Watching UND win the championship again was nice, but after the breaking the Denver hex and seeing the inside of the new stadium, beating St. Cloud again just gets to be kind of blah.
2011
The Final Five: Anchorage, Bemidji, Colorado College, Denver, Duluth, North Dakota
Highlight: The darkest days in Gopher hockey are upon us, as Minnesota is swept out of the playoffs on home ice by lowly Anchorage. Two seasons in a row of something that used to be a given has fans looking for answers, and generally lamenting the horror of the whole situation. Bemidji fans make a nice effort to pick up the slack caused by Minnesota and St. Cloud missing the tourney, and are rewarded with a fun OT victory. North Dakota plays two thrillers on it's way to back-to-back titles, beating CC with a late 3rd period goal in the semis and Denver in double-OT on Saturday.
2012
The Final Five: Denver, Duluth, Michigan Tech, Minnesota, North Dakota, St. Cloud
Highlight: Gophers back at full strength, if they tell you they always were, that's not true, it's not even debateable. Also unique for the first Michigan Tech sighting in 4 years, but this year's tourney will forever be known to North Dakota fans as the "Timeout Game". After getting worked like a part-time job for 30 minutes and trailing 3-0 in the Friday night semifinal, UND called a timeout...then promptly ran off 6 straight goals to complete the scoring. I've never in my life seen a game in any sport turn so completely. The next night they thumped Denver 4-0 to win an almost passe 3rd Broadmoor trophy in a row. Unfortunately, after continuing that tradition, they also continued the tradition of the Final Five victor between these two teams losing in the national tourney, as Minnesota ended their season a week later.
So what will happen this year? Will North Dakota make it 4 in a row? Will St. Cloud win their first title in 10 years? Will Mankato make a run at their first ever? Will the Gophers finally get back to the championship game for the first time in 6 years?
ALl I know is, I can't wait to find out, drop the puck!
Last July, when the news of another early departure shook the Gopher hockey program, I opined on how far things had fallen the past few years. Since then, as another disappointing season unfolded, my feelings haven't changed. While I definitely don't want to see Minnesota back on top of the college hockey heap, the lack of their presence at the league tourney takes some of the wind out of it's sails. Never is that felt more keenly than a day like today, instead of eager anticipation, many of my compatriots and stuck lamenting what went wrong. I'm not going to let it affect my mood, as my team is still scheduled for Friday night at the X, and I'm extremely fired up. It's just that events are always more fun when people are fired up and attendance is solid, the more buzz the merrier.
So instead of a Thursday night game and potential showdown with the Sioux looming, Gopher fans get to spend today wondering how they've managed to sink lower still. As I wrote last week, Anchorage is not a good team. They may have played well this past weekend, and gotten some phenomenal goaltending, but they're still an 8th place team with a losing record. Minnesota can, has and should've blown them off the ice. Or at least pushed it to a third game. Or at a minimum looked interested in participating on Saturday! Instead, they followed up a poor effort on Friday with one that was even worse on Saturday. The issues facing the team have been re-hashed ad nauseum over the past few years, and it's happening enough places right now that I don't need to belabor it here. Let me just say that although we don't see eye to eye, I feel your pain Gopher fans, and hope this thing gets back to respectability soon.
But enough of that negativity, because as I've mentioned several times, the best sports weekend of the year starts this Thursday!!!
My personal Top 5:
1) Final Five/March Madness - In a class by itself, due to the nonstop action it offers. Do-or-die hoops action starts at 11 AM and runs until midnight, with a constant stream of clutch moments throughout. 48 games hammered out in 96 hours, whittling the 64 tourney teams down to 16 by Sunday evening. But March Madness is only the backdrop for things, and although it's the greatest backdrop one could wish for, it's secondary to the live action on the ice. Toss in 5 hockey games over the course of 3 days and, at least in a typical year, one of America's best St. Patrick's Day celebrations...well you had me at hello.
2) NFL opening weekend/college football/MLB pennant races - I probably rate this higher than some, due to my love of football. But when you have the most popular league in America kicking off the day after you get your first dose of big time college matchups (following the first weekend's slate of cupcakes in tune-up games, and have important baseball games happening to boot? Well that's one heck of a weekend!
3) The Masters/MLB return/NHL crunch time/Frozen Four - If you're not a golf fan, that's unfortunate, because the Master's is a great event that serves as the signal spring has finally arrived each year. It typically coincides with one of the first weekends of baseball season, either the last regular season/first playoff weekend in the NHL and college hockey's Frozen Four. Pretty darn good slate there when it all comes together, and kind of the bridge between the seasons in this part of the world. Sure NHL season won't technically be over for another 8 weeks, but psychologically you're moving on down the road.
4) Final weekend in October - Tipoff of the NBA intersecting with baseball playoffs makes this the only time all year that the 4 major sports are happening at the same time.
5) Thanksgiving - Okay, so sports aren't the first thing that spring to mind when you think Thanksgiving, but with the staggered NFL schedule, the college basketball and hockey tourneys, NBA and NHL throwing out their best matchups and a full slate of crucial college football games, it definitely makes the cut. Used to be neck-and-neck in this slot with NFL Draft weekend (playoff hockey, early-season baseball, etc.), but then they moved the draft to Thursday night and screwed everything up.
So there it is, the best of them all starts in only a few short days, and I couldn't be more excited. Started attending this tourney a few years ago, and if it's up to me, will never miss it.
Some personal memories:
2003
The Final Five: Colorado College, Duluth, Mankato, Minnesota, North Dakota
Highlight: Not much for me, as the only game I attended was the unceremonious 2-1 bouncing of the Sioux by the Duluth Bulldogs. About the only thing I remember about it was thinking it was the emptiest I'd ever seen the Xcel Center. I guess this is the part where I'm supposed to note that I regret missing Mankato's only appearance in the tourney since I've been attending. I'm not losing too much sleep.
2004
The Final Five: Anchorage(!), Colorado College, Duluth, Mankato, Minnesota, North Dakota
Highlight: Also only made it to one game this time out, but it was an amazing one that made me a fan of this tourney for life. Won't rehash that all again, just repeat it was one of the best games I've ever seen. I'll always remember getting the call that there was an extra ticket and catching a ride down with a buddy. His girlfriend (now wife) gave us a ride, and when we hopped out of the car, I manage to kick a toy that was in the backseat onto West 7th. I picked up what I thought was all of said toy, but apparently lost some piece of it.
This would seem a trivial and forgettable episode, but for the fact it caused me to get branded for the rest of my days as "the guy who kicked my son's toy into the street". Not a good moniker to carry, as bad as being "that drunk guy who pissed on the floor", which I've also been on a couple of occasions. Not proud of that. Of course I am not "that drunk guy who took a header down the stairs at McGovern's and opened up a bloody gash on his forehead", that was my aforementioned pal Jud, about two hours after his Gophers won the title, good times.
2005
The Final Five: Colorado College, Denver, Minnesota, North Dakota, Wisconsin
Highlight: You know in soccer, when a guy scores a goal, then goes running full speed and slides along the ground while celebrating? I've determined that it also works quite well on the carpeting at the X. North Dakota was battling for it's tourney life during the Thursday night play-in game against Wisconsin. As luck would have it, this particular Thursday also coincided with St. Paddy's, and I'd been celebrating since the AM hours. The Sioux scored a huge third period goal to take the lead and the Mexican Soccer Slide was born. I came to rest at the feet of two St. Paul cops, who were more than a bit amused with my celebration. Not wanting to get into any line of questioning about how much I'd had to drink that day, I simply hopped up, said "Huge goal" and went back to the business of spectating. The tourney ended with a dull 1-0 Denver victory over Colorado College in the championship game, but will always be remembered as my first year attending every game.
2006
The Final Five: Duluth, Minnesota, North Dakota, St. Cloud, Wisconsin
Highlight: This was the first time I got to see the Sioux win this tourney, an impressive feat for a team that had finished 5th in the conference and having something of a down season. That championship was somewhat overshadowed by another game that, while I wouldn't call it one of the best I've seen played, would certainly rank among the most entertaining. St. Cloud was a .500 team during the 2005-06 season, that found itself up against league champion Minnesota in the Friday night semifinal. What ensued was a wild and crazy affair that included 15 goals, a 3-goal comeback by the Gophers, which included tallies with under a second left in the 2nd period and 15 seconds remaining to force OT in the 3rd. Just when you thought St. Cloud was done, they popped the OT winner past my all-time favorite Gopher, Jeff Frazee, and moved on to meet Nodak in the Finals. Hilarious because it led directly to our buddy Andy f-bombing Frazee in front of his dad at next year's tourney.
2007
The Final Five: Michigan Tech, Minnesota, North Dakota, St. Cloud, Wisconsin
Highlight: Tech sighting! Typically, the only representation Tech has at the Final Five is it's excellent band, they're the ones dressed in yellow-and-black striped overall. (Quick sidenote, while sitting in a suite during 2006, our group pioneered the "invite the entire band into the suite to play a tune" craze that has become common at this tourney. The idea came from a wily Xcel employee who thought it would be funny to sneak the band in as a surprise to an extremely hungover member of the entourage during Saturday's third-place game. Turns out it was hilarious and a tradition was born that got brought back every year. But like anything else, people saw it and it spawned a gang of imitators. Just know it was not your idea.) If memory serves, this was also the year when my buddy Scott saw a man get struck by vehicle, another championship classic.
Scott was minding his own business, talking on the phone out in front of the Liffey, when a guy stepped out into the street and got SMOKED, losing his shoes and cell phone in the process. Scott and others rushed over to see if the gent was still breathing, but after a couple of unconscious minutes, he popped up, retrieved his phone and picked up the conversation right where he'd left off. This is the kind of thing you absolutely kill yourself for missing when you hear the story, could've crossed something off the bucket list and I was 30 yards away! Missed opportunities.
Oh yeah, there was also a g championship game that year, some guy named Wheeler scored
2008
The Final Five: Colorado College, Denver, Minnesota, North Dakota, St. Cloud
Highlight: This year's tourney was all about Minnesota. The Gophers entered the playoffs as a bubble team, played an epic three-game series on the road at Mankato (total of 5 OT periods in 3 games, and the classic "everyone in this building is standing, except for the folks in wheelchairs" quote from Doug Woog), beat St. Cloud in a 3-2 play-in thriller (for which I was seated on the glass) and beat CC in OT, before giving Denver all they could handle in a 2-1 championship loss. The Sioux fell to Denver in the semifinals, which I believe was their 581st consecutive Final Five loss to the Pioneers. Or perhaps it just seemed that way.
2009
The Final Five: Denver, Duluth, Minnesota, North Dakota, Wisconsin
Highlight: Duluth becomes the first team to win the title from the play-in game, ousting Minnesota, North Dakota and Denver along the way. Uber-hot goaltender Alex Stalock allows one goal in three games, pitching shutouts in the last two. My brother came to the tourney this year, and we scared him so bad that he hasn't been back since. At least that's what I think.
2010
The Final Five: Denver, Duluth, North Dakota, St. Cloud, Wisconsin
Highlight: The first non-Gopher year I ever experienced, and sadly not the last, the atmosphere wasn't quite on par with past seasons. But things were great on the ice, as the Sioux finally hand Denver it's first ever loss in a Final Five at the Xcel, with a 4-3 victory in the Friday night semifinal. I believe the streak got to 10 games, meaning the Pioneers had won five tourney titles in the last decade without a single blemish on their record. Of course they missed the tourney entirely a few times, as noted previously, but still a huge monkey to get rid of. Other highlight of the weekend was touring Target Field that Saturday. Watching UND win the championship again was nice, but after the breaking the Denver hex and seeing the inside of the new stadium, beating St. Cloud again just gets to be kind of blah.
2011
The Final Five: Anchorage, Bemidji, Colorado College, Denver, Duluth, North Dakota
Highlight: The darkest days in Gopher hockey are upon us, as Minnesota is swept out of the playoffs on home ice by lowly Anchorage. Two seasons in a row of something that used to be a given has fans looking for answers, and generally lamenting the horror of the whole situation. Bemidji fans make a nice effort to pick up the slack caused by Minnesota and St. Cloud missing the tourney, and are rewarded with a fun OT victory. North Dakota plays two thrillers on it's way to back-to-back titles, beating CC with a late 3rd period goal in the semis and Denver in double-OT on Saturday.
2012
The Final Five: Denver, Duluth, Michigan Tech, Minnesota, North Dakota, St. Cloud
Highlight: Gophers back at full strength, if they tell you they always were, that's not true, it's not even debateable. Also unique for the first Michigan Tech sighting in 4 years, but this year's tourney will forever be known to North Dakota fans as the "Timeout Game". After getting worked like a part-time job for 30 minutes and trailing 3-0 in the Friday night semifinal, UND called a timeout...then promptly ran off 6 straight goals to complete the scoring. I've never in my life seen a game in any sport turn so completely. The next night they thumped Denver 4-0 to win an almost passe 3rd Broadmoor trophy in a row. Unfortunately, after continuing that tradition, they also continued the tradition of the Final Five victor between these two teams losing in the national tourney, as Minnesota ended their season a week later.
So what will happen this year? Will North Dakota make it 4 in a row? Will St. Cloud win their first title in 10 years? Will Mankato make a run at their first ever? Will the Gophers finally get back to the championship game for the first time in 6 years?
ALl I know is, I can't wait to find out, drop the puck!
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