It's come to my attention recently that some people feel most of what I write is overly negative. There's even been concern expressed over my mental well-being. To take the second point first, let me assure you that I am fine, and not suffering any ill effects from the constant stream of bad news that has been the last year of Minnesota sports. After so many letdowns, only great disappointment has the power to wound, and in order to be greatly disappointed, you must first have some kind of expectations. Save for the Fighting Sioux hockey team, there hasn't been much in the way of expectations during the last cycle of the calendar. Falls don't hurt so bad when you've only climbed to the first rung of the ladder, the current situation is rolling over me like water off a duck's back.
As to the first point, the blog is called Loserville for a reason, and man has this town been living up to that moniker lately. Although I trend negative due to years of experience, there have been nuggets of optimism sprinkled through these posts. Sure the doldrums of summer tend to get me down, but the last post was packed with upcoming highlights of the fall season, what could be more optimistic than that? I picked the Twins to win the division and Gopher football team to win 7 games last year, that's looks like optimism bordering on delusion at this point.
But being that we're on the cusp of a new season, it's probably a good time to pump things up and get excited about the prospects of the various local teams. There will be plenty of time to lament failure later on. If sports had it's own calendar, then August 31st would be New Year's Eve; tomorrow September starts, and with it comes fresh versions of football, hockey and basketball teams at all levels. Baseball has it's own weird calendar that doesn't really fit, like it's run by the Mayans or something, but for the rest of the world, the slate has been wiped clean, and it's time to get rolling.
So now, I will attempt my most difficult feat. In a town where all four professional teams have missed the playoffs, the college football team was not bowl-eligible, the college basketball team failed to qualify for March Madness and the college hockey team couldn't make it's own conference tourney, I am going to be 100% positive:
Sure, it's been a rough season for the Twins, but have you ever seen a team with this many injury issues? They got a little fat and happy with their new stadium and division championship last season, and things slipped a bit, but give it a year and they'll be back on top, looking down at the Tigers and White Sox like they've done all decade. Plenty of money coming off the books, the young guys continue to improve, things will be just fine.
Sure, the Wolves have been an NBA laughingstock for the last few seasons and will likely start the season in a lockout, but all signs point to Rick Adelman as the new coaching hire, which could be a game-changer for the franchise. We'll give them a mulligan on the Rambis thing, he was a bad fit from the start, and it was good that they recognized their mistake and cut their losses. With all the young talent on this team, there's a lot to be excited about, all it will take is a patient coach who knows how to tap into said talent, and Adelman is likely that guy.
Sure, the Wild made a bunch of signings that killed their cap flexibility in the present and future, but with some of those contracts coming off the books and a few savvy trades, they have the look of a playoff contender. The young defenseman will need to step up, along with the goaltending, but the upcoming Wild squad appears to have more scoring punch than any version since the days of a healthy Marian Gaborik, which we know weren't many.
Sure, the Vikings missed their window, and are entering a transitional period, but who's to say what will happen in an NFL season? Although it's going to take a lot of luck to get over .500, worse teams than this have qualified for the playoffs, it's the one league where (almost) every team truly has a shot. Heck, the Bears won 11 games last year, and I'm not sure they were markedly more talented that this year's Vikings squad, a couple breaks can go a long way.
Sure, the Gopher football team was atrocious last season, but the finish they put together made it more clear than ever that the biggest problem with the team was gameday coaching. Winning 2 out of 3 Big Ten games to finish out isn't exactly cause for celebration, but it is something to build on, and reminds us that you can't overstate the importance of not being coached by Tim Brewster when it comes to winning football games. At least the current guy running things is somebody you want to root for, not someone who seems like he should be trying to sell your the undercoat package on a 2004 Chrysler Seabring.
Sure, the Gopher hoops team finished far below expectations, but there were plenty of bright spots before the team got decimated by defections and injuries. At various points during the season, the team was on solid footing, only to have the rug pulled by yet another injury. The silver lining is the experience that last year's freshman got, and will be bringing into this season. Toss in what's been, by all accounts, a solid recruiting class, and there's no reason to expect a repeat of last year's limp to the finish.
Sure, Gopher hockey has fallen on hard times, but the fact remains that it will always have one of the most talented rosters in the country, and the most oft-cited problem with the coaching staff has been rectified. Nobody is saynig national championship, but it can't be ignored that the Gophers played their best against top teams, beating 3 of the 4 Frozen Four participants last season. Adding some consistency to that high-end play should at least get the team back in the NCAA tourney this season, and from there, who knows?
Alright, I hope that helped, doubtful that it will be a frequent occurrence as things play out, but there's no reason to pile on too heavy at this point.
As I've said, plenty of time for that once the games start :)
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Friday, August 26, 2011
The Fall Guy
I'm probably the only person you know that is ecstatic about summer ending.
Most people treasure the long days and hot temperatures for outdoor activities. Those of us in the frigid northern climes are especially appreciative, using the warm months and lighter workload to take vacations, spend time at cabins or other getaways, and just generally live life at a slower pace.
It is, in a word, boring.
I'm not just talking about the sports calendar, which obviously takes a big hit after June 1st, I'm talking about life in general. Routines are shattered, you never know where anyone is, all sense of urgency vanishes, the weather gets interminably hot and makes you not want to leave the house, it's terrible. Sending a happy hour email on a Friday afternoon in September draws a crowd, in July, you'd get four out-of-office autoreplies and a couple of lame excuses about having to run a 5k in the morning. If not for golf and barbecuing, there would be precious little redeeming value to the whole summer season.
At this point, you're most likely thinking "this guy is nuts", but with each passing year I looked forward to Labor Day's arrival a little bit more, and the events of the past week have only made the autumn yen stronger. I suppose things are different if you're a student, particularly in the little kid days, when the end of summer and return to school was cause for reactions like this. But I am a student, who has to start back up the first Tuesday in September, and to that I say hogwash.
Fall has better weather, better scenery and better fun than summer. Fall has Oktoberfest, summer has Summer Shandy. Fall has 75 and sunny, summer has 95 and sweaty. Fall has leaves turning and cool sweatshirt evenings, summer has bugs (at least typically) and confinement in central air. Sure, I know that fall is the forebear of the season we all hate (and after last winter the first snowflake I see is likely to make me fall to the ground and begin sobbing uncontrollably), but it can't be punished simply for what follows it on the calendar. Doing so would be akin to boycotting the two-hour season finale of your favorite show because in protest of the fact that it wouldn't be on for the next four months. Most good things are fleeting, can't hold that against them.
In fact, the best thing to do when faced with this situation is to gear up, have a plan and execute it with ruthless precision. To be clear, I describe the fall season as beginning September 1st and ending October 31st. November is a bit of a crapshoot around here, ideally you'll get a couple more weeks of fall, but it's very possible you'll find yourself quite literally knee-deep in winter.
Yesterday was the start of the Minnesota State Fair, or as I like to think of it, the beginning of summer's death rattle. Things are going to start happening fast and furious in the next few weeks, so you need to hit September like a team of Navy SEALS jumping off a helicopter: Move fast, establish a perimeter, execute and bug out before the enemy (read: winter) can mount a counteroffensive. Oh yeah, obviously leaving some figurative explosions in your wake is mandatory, no reason to get off that chopper in the first place if nothing's going to get blown up.
So what's penciled into my personal planner for the next 8 weeks? Glad you asked...
Fantasy football drafts
The nerdiest thing that I do every year is spend countelss hours pouring over stats and analysis to pick a perfect team of players to participate in fake football games. People sometimes mock this, but they're usually the type of people who read US Weekly and watch Dancing With the Stars. In other words, they've lost all credibility to mock anyone for anything. I pity these poor souls, because they've never got to experience the fun of draft day, getting everything to fall just perfectly, the exact way you planned it out...and then having the whole thing come crumbling down like the ACL of your star running back week one. I love fantasy football, and always will, I wear my nerd mantle proudly.
Labor Day weekend
The SEAL analogy couldn't be more appropriate regarding my annual trip to the State Fair. I don't particularly like crowds, but don't really mind them either, provided they have some sort of collective agenda. You go to a sporting event, you deal with a lot of people doing a lot of different things, but always doing something (heading for food, seats, bathroom, etc). The State Fair is like the Olympics of aimlessly milling about, no one knows where they're going and doesn't really care when they get there. I can't abide that, so have a very strict policy that encapsulates my visits between the hours of 11-3 on the Friday of Labor Day weekend. That might seem like a small window to some, but as I said, this season needs to be rigidly metered out, or it will get away from you in a hurry. One year the US military actually sent observers to better understand my methods. Sadly they couldn't keep up, and were lost in the mass of humaity that is the cheese curd booth, and to my knowledge have not been heard from since. That's one of the many areas where the US military is far superior to me, I will leave a man on the field of battle. In a season this ruthless, it's every man for himself. You want guarantees? I suggest you stick with summer.
Oh yeah, this is also the kickoff to college football, which should be highlighted by a historic Gopher upset to start the Jerry Kill Era (more on that next week) and a pair of dynamite primetime games. It ain't the NFL, but just because you don't have chess pieces, doesn't mean you can't play some entertaining rounds of checkers.
September 8th-11th
Opening weekend of the NFL, nuff said. Not only do we get a great game between Green Bay and New Orleans to start things off on Thursday, they NFL is nice enough to throw in a Monday night doubleheader. Although looking at the schedule, they might be doing that to apologize for the caliber of games airing on ESPN. Looking at the schedules for the first two months of Sunday and Monday night games, it looks like NBC must've won a bet or something:
Sunday night: Cowboys @ Jets, Eagles @ Falcons, Steelers @ Colts, Jets @ Ravens, Packers @ Falcons, Vikings @ Bears, Colts @ Saints, Cowboys @ Eagles
Monday night: Patriots @ Dolphins, Raiders @ Broncos, Rams @ Giants, Redskins @ Cowboys, Colts @ Bucs, Bears @ Lions, Dolphins @ Jets, Ravens @ Jaguars, Chargers @ Chiefs
Analyzing the Sunday slate, the Vikings-Bears tilt is the only one that has the look of a clunker. Meanwhile, the Monday schedule is littered with potholes. I wasn't planning on watching a Dolphins game all year, do we really need them making up 25% of the Monday night schedule through the end of October? If you're going to schedule them, at least do it toward the end of the season, when the flex scheduling starts and they can be replaced by a game people actually care about. I'm also scratching my head as to why "Redskins" and "national television" are making their way into the same sentence, but I suppose you have to throw every team a bone once in awhile.
Mid-September thru mid-October
Somewhere in your town, there is a bar that has a large Oktoberfest gathering, most likely featuring a tent, dark beer and lot of sauerkraut. My advice would be to find said bar and enjoy the only holiday that officially revolves around drinking. Sure, St. Paddy's has evolved that way, but there were actual historic events of some kind that gave rise to it. Oktoberfest simply stems from the age old notion of "Hey, what if we got a bunch of kegs and threw a big party?", and I think we can all get on board with that. Make sure you try the snuff.
Any cool evening
For MSP folks only, go to Sweeney's in St. Paul and sit by the big fireplace. A lot is made of the various patios about town during the summer, but a cool October evening next to a 12-foot brick hearth with a roaring fire rates right up there with any of them. In fact you could make a stop there on your way to or from...
October 8th
The Wild season opener is the centerpiece of a massive hockey weekend, with college teams kicking off as well. As a matter of fact, when I discussed the best sports weekends back in March, I unfairly omitted this one. Opening weekend of the baseball playoffs, both types of football in full swing and openers for college and pro hockey? I think that slots in solidly at #3, bumping down the Masters/NHL playoffs combo.
October 15th
Hoping to be making my triumphant return to Ralph Englestad Arena to watch the Sioux taken on the (somewhat) hated Maine Black Bears. We'll see how things shape up there.
October 22nd and/or 29th
Nebraska and Iowa visit TCF Bank Stadium in back-to-back weeks, the only question is, one game or both? Leaning toward both at the moment.
So that's it, my blueprint for the fall season. Of course this is just a framework, and will be constantly modified and retouched as needed, but a whole lot of things are out there to look forward to, and that's just the way I like it. Many happy returns of the best season of the year.
Most people treasure the long days and hot temperatures for outdoor activities. Those of us in the frigid northern climes are especially appreciative, using the warm months and lighter workload to take vacations, spend time at cabins or other getaways, and just generally live life at a slower pace.
It is, in a word, boring.
I'm not just talking about the sports calendar, which obviously takes a big hit after June 1st, I'm talking about life in general. Routines are shattered, you never know where anyone is, all sense of urgency vanishes, the weather gets interminably hot and makes you not want to leave the house, it's terrible. Sending a happy hour email on a Friday afternoon in September draws a crowd, in July, you'd get four out-of-office autoreplies and a couple of lame excuses about having to run a 5k in the morning. If not for golf and barbecuing, there would be precious little redeeming value to the whole summer season.
At this point, you're most likely thinking "this guy is nuts", but with each passing year I looked forward to Labor Day's arrival a little bit more, and the events of the past week have only made the autumn yen stronger. I suppose things are different if you're a student, particularly in the little kid days, when the end of summer and return to school was cause for reactions like this. But I am a student, who has to start back up the first Tuesday in September, and to that I say hogwash.
Fall has better weather, better scenery and better fun than summer. Fall has Oktoberfest, summer has Summer Shandy. Fall has 75 and sunny, summer has 95 and sweaty. Fall has leaves turning and cool sweatshirt evenings, summer has bugs (at least typically) and confinement in central air. Sure, I know that fall is the forebear of the season we all hate (and after last winter the first snowflake I see is likely to make me fall to the ground and begin sobbing uncontrollably), but it can't be punished simply for what follows it on the calendar. Doing so would be akin to boycotting the two-hour season finale of your favorite show because in protest of the fact that it wouldn't be on for the next four months. Most good things are fleeting, can't hold that against them.
In fact, the best thing to do when faced with this situation is to gear up, have a plan and execute it with ruthless precision. To be clear, I describe the fall season as beginning September 1st and ending October 31st. November is a bit of a crapshoot around here, ideally you'll get a couple more weeks of fall, but it's very possible you'll find yourself quite literally knee-deep in winter.
Yesterday was the start of the Minnesota State Fair, or as I like to think of it, the beginning of summer's death rattle. Things are going to start happening fast and furious in the next few weeks, so you need to hit September like a team of Navy SEALS jumping off a helicopter: Move fast, establish a perimeter, execute and bug out before the enemy (read: winter) can mount a counteroffensive. Oh yeah, obviously leaving some figurative explosions in your wake is mandatory, no reason to get off that chopper in the first place if nothing's going to get blown up.
So what's penciled into my personal planner for the next 8 weeks? Glad you asked...
Fantasy football drafts
The nerdiest thing that I do every year is spend countelss hours pouring over stats and analysis to pick a perfect team of players to participate in fake football games. People sometimes mock this, but they're usually the type of people who read US Weekly and watch Dancing With the Stars. In other words, they've lost all credibility to mock anyone for anything. I pity these poor souls, because they've never got to experience the fun of draft day, getting everything to fall just perfectly, the exact way you planned it out...and then having the whole thing come crumbling down like the ACL of your star running back week one. I love fantasy football, and always will, I wear my nerd mantle proudly.
Labor Day weekend
The SEAL analogy couldn't be more appropriate regarding my annual trip to the State Fair. I don't particularly like crowds, but don't really mind them either, provided they have some sort of collective agenda. You go to a sporting event, you deal with a lot of people doing a lot of different things, but always doing something (heading for food, seats, bathroom, etc). The State Fair is like the Olympics of aimlessly milling about, no one knows where they're going and doesn't really care when they get there. I can't abide that, so have a very strict policy that encapsulates my visits between the hours of 11-3 on the Friday of Labor Day weekend. That might seem like a small window to some, but as I said, this season needs to be rigidly metered out, or it will get away from you in a hurry. One year the US military actually sent observers to better understand my methods. Sadly they couldn't keep up, and were lost in the mass of humaity that is the cheese curd booth, and to my knowledge have not been heard from since. That's one of the many areas where the US military is far superior to me, I will leave a man on the field of battle. In a season this ruthless, it's every man for himself. You want guarantees? I suggest you stick with summer.
Oh yeah, this is also the kickoff to college football, which should be highlighted by a historic Gopher upset to start the Jerry Kill Era (more on that next week) and a pair of dynamite primetime games. It ain't the NFL, but just because you don't have chess pieces, doesn't mean you can't play some entertaining rounds of checkers.
September 8th-11th
Opening weekend of the NFL, nuff said. Not only do we get a great game between Green Bay and New Orleans to start things off on Thursday, they NFL is nice enough to throw in a Monday night doubleheader. Although looking at the schedule, they might be doing that to apologize for the caliber of games airing on ESPN. Looking at the schedules for the first two months of Sunday and Monday night games, it looks like NBC must've won a bet or something:
Sunday night: Cowboys @ Jets, Eagles @ Falcons, Steelers @ Colts, Jets @ Ravens, Packers @ Falcons, Vikings @ Bears, Colts @ Saints, Cowboys @ Eagles
Monday night: Patriots @ Dolphins, Raiders @ Broncos, Rams @ Giants, Redskins @ Cowboys, Colts @ Bucs, Bears @ Lions, Dolphins @ Jets, Ravens @ Jaguars, Chargers @ Chiefs
Analyzing the Sunday slate, the Vikings-Bears tilt is the only one that has the look of a clunker. Meanwhile, the Monday schedule is littered with potholes. I wasn't planning on watching a Dolphins game all year, do we really need them making up 25% of the Monday night schedule through the end of October? If you're going to schedule them, at least do it toward the end of the season, when the flex scheduling starts and they can be replaced by a game people actually care about. I'm also scratching my head as to why "Redskins" and "national television" are making their way into the same sentence, but I suppose you have to throw every team a bone once in awhile.
Mid-September thru mid-October
Somewhere in your town, there is a bar that has a large Oktoberfest gathering, most likely featuring a tent, dark beer and lot of sauerkraut. My advice would be to find said bar and enjoy the only holiday that officially revolves around drinking. Sure, St. Paddy's has evolved that way, but there were actual historic events of some kind that gave rise to it. Oktoberfest simply stems from the age old notion of "Hey, what if we got a bunch of kegs and threw a big party?", and I think we can all get on board with that. Make sure you try the snuff.
Any cool evening
For MSP folks only, go to Sweeney's in St. Paul and sit by the big fireplace. A lot is made of the various patios about town during the summer, but a cool October evening next to a 12-foot brick hearth with a roaring fire rates right up there with any of them. In fact you could make a stop there on your way to or from...
October 8th
The Wild season opener is the centerpiece of a massive hockey weekend, with college teams kicking off as well. As a matter of fact, when I discussed the best sports weekends back in March, I unfairly omitted this one. Opening weekend of the baseball playoffs, both types of football in full swing and openers for college and pro hockey? I think that slots in solidly at #3, bumping down the Masters/NHL playoffs combo.
October 15th
Hoping to be making my triumphant return to Ralph Englestad Arena to watch the Sioux taken on the (somewhat) hated Maine Black Bears. We'll see how things shape up there.
October 22nd and/or 29th
Nebraska and Iowa visit TCF Bank Stadium in back-to-back weeks, the only question is, one game or both? Leaning toward both at the moment.
So that's it, my blueprint for the fall season. Of course this is just a framework, and will be constantly modified and retouched as needed, but a whole lot of things are out there to look forward to, and that's just the way I like it. Many happy returns of the best season of the year.
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Chairman of the Bored
I'm bored.
Bored, bored, bored and bored. Bored to death, bored to tears, bored to the point of trying to figure out ways to gamble on the Little League World Series.
Every year, I spend the last couple weeks of August waiting for the first couple weeks of September to arrive. A terrible Twins team has meant this year has been worse than most. The greatest two months on the calendar is right around the corner, and can't get here fast enough...which of course means life is crawling along at a snail's pace.
I'm sure a lot of people would strongly disagree, since the turn of the calendar to September is the first step on the path to winter's return, and they'll take all the summer that they can get. But for the sports fan, it's like trying to fall asleep on Christmas Eve, you know that things are right around the corner, but the anticipation makes the wait interminable! I'm not sure how common my feelings on this are, but thinking about that got me considering other idiosyncrasies, and wondering if anyone else shared them.
Are you like me, when you see two people sitting next to each other talking on phones, do you pretend they're talking to each other?
Are you like me, do you find the use of chopsticks pretentious and un-American, to the point of wanting to walk up to someone, grab one of the sticks, throw it on the floor and yell "What now?!?!?!" as they helplessly poke at their food with the remaining piece of wood?
Are you like me, do you peruse obituaries when you're having a bad day as a reminder that things could be going much worse?
Are you like me, when you see a guy with a spiky, over-gelled, Jersey Shore type of hairstyle, do you calculate the gambling odds of him winning a fistfight with a butch lesbian sporting to same hairdo? And typically come away thinking you'd wager on said bull dyke?
Are you like me, when eating vanilla ice cream with chocolate syrup, do you feel a need to mix the two together until you have a bowl of chocolate ice cream? Then wonder why you didn't just buy chocolate ice cream in the first place?
Are you like me, eagerly anticipating the first sighting of Oktoberfest brews to replace the wheat/lemon/orange/cherry abomination that are summer beers?
Are you like me, do you think there's a strong correlation between a bad having numbers in it's name and roaylly sucking? (U2, Maroon 5, Matchbox 20)
Are you like me, do you completely ignore the atrocious nutrition info found in articles like this, and just think about how tasty everything looks?
Are you like me, do you think that everyone should all get free ice cream any day the Dow drops more than 400 points?
Are you like me, does the word "Kardashian" reflexively make your hand shoot out and slap whoever said it?
Are you like me, do you think it's high time that MMA stepped up to the precedent of it's historical forebears and went to full-scale gladiator fights to the death on barges anchored in international waters?
Are you like me, in realizing that the slighty burnt Cheez-It is the tastiest one, and wondering why in the myriad flavors they've created, there is no option for a full box of slighty burned Cheez-Its?
Are you like me, do you think the reason so many Americans are fat is because all the exercise machines have a warning that says "Stop using if you feel short of breath"? Isn't feeling short of breath kind of the point?
Yeah, I didn't think so.
Bored, bored, bored and bored. Bored to death, bored to tears, bored to the point of trying to figure out ways to gamble on the Little League World Series.
Every year, I spend the last couple weeks of August waiting for the first couple weeks of September to arrive. A terrible Twins team has meant this year has been worse than most. The greatest two months on the calendar is right around the corner, and can't get here fast enough...which of course means life is crawling along at a snail's pace.
I'm sure a lot of people would strongly disagree, since the turn of the calendar to September is the first step on the path to winter's return, and they'll take all the summer that they can get. But for the sports fan, it's like trying to fall asleep on Christmas Eve, you know that things are right around the corner, but the anticipation makes the wait interminable! I'm not sure how common my feelings on this are, but thinking about that got me considering other idiosyncrasies, and wondering if anyone else shared them.
Are you like me, when you see two people sitting next to each other talking on phones, do you pretend they're talking to each other?
Are you like me, do you find the use of chopsticks pretentious and un-American, to the point of wanting to walk up to someone, grab one of the sticks, throw it on the floor and yell "What now?!?!?!" as they helplessly poke at their food with the remaining piece of wood?
Are you like me, do you peruse obituaries when you're having a bad day as a reminder that things could be going much worse?
Are you like me, when you see a guy with a spiky, over-gelled, Jersey Shore type of hairstyle, do you calculate the gambling odds of him winning a fistfight with a butch lesbian sporting to same hairdo? And typically come away thinking you'd wager on said bull dyke?
Are you like me, when eating vanilla ice cream with chocolate syrup, do you feel a need to mix the two together until you have a bowl of chocolate ice cream? Then wonder why you didn't just buy chocolate ice cream in the first place?
Are you like me, eagerly anticipating the first sighting of Oktoberfest brews to replace the wheat/lemon/orange/cherry abomination that are summer beers?
Are you like me, do you think there's a strong correlation between a bad having numbers in it's name and roaylly sucking? (U2, Maroon 5, Matchbox 20)
Are you like me, do you completely ignore the atrocious nutrition info found in articles like this, and just think about how tasty everything looks?
Are you like me, do you think that everyone should all get free ice cream any day the Dow drops more than 400 points?
Are you like me, does the word "Kardashian" reflexively make your hand shoot out and slap whoever said it?
Are you like me, do you think it's high time that MMA stepped up to the precedent of it's historical forebears and went to full-scale gladiator fights to the death on barges anchored in international waters?
Are you like me, in realizing that the slighty burnt Cheez-It is the tastiest one, and wondering why in the myriad flavors they've created, there is no option for a full box of slighty burned Cheez-Its?
Are you like me, do you think the reason so many Americans are fat is because all the exercise machines have a warning that says "Stop using if you feel short of breath"? Isn't feeling short of breath kind of the point?
Yeah, I didn't think so.
Friday, August 19, 2011
Fairness Doctrine
During the interminable middle weeks of August, waiting for football to finish it's warmup and get on with things, a bad baseball team can make your mind wander to odd places it normally wouldn't. Stories about groups of people in Iowa, gathering to eat pie and endorse political candidates, manage to creep into all forms of media, even sports radio. In lulls, people do what they have to do to find talkers, unfortunately most of them aren't worth talking about.
In general, it seems like normal people are pissed off at rich people, and I suppose that I understand where that comes from. Sometimes it feels like the game is rigged, and watching some silver-spoon a-hole coast through life while the rest of us scratch out a living will tick you off. There are rules that probably need to be tweaked, and changes made, but in general it seems like some people need to be reminded of what their parents told them as kids: Life isn't fair.
We all have some stuff we get lucky with in life and some areas where we get screwed. I'm a reasonably healthy, somewhat intelligent man, blessed to have a solid upbringing that gave me opportunities in life. At the same time, there's that pesky genetic predisposition toward carrying a few extra pounds and having a head the size of a watermelon that I've had to overcome. Rich people presumably got to where they are due to some combination of good fortune and hardwork, if we're going to go after them, shouldn't I be able to even the playing field somehow between every guy out there who's better looking than me?
You'd probably scoff at the logic, but I think it's sound. Some guy hits the genetic lottery and ends up being able to attract women in any situation. Doesn't matter if he's got a G.E.D. and a string of illegitimate kids, he'll always do okay in that department. This guy didn't do anything in particular to deserve that, just had the good fortune with DNA. In order to make this situation more fair, shouldn't I be able to disfigure and/or otherwise do something to make him less attractive? After all, I'm struggling over here, need to level the playing field and give guys like me a chance to succeed. The attractive "rich" are pushing out middle class types.
Preposterous comparison? Perhaps, but it does illustrate that all sorts of chance occurrences are going to impact your lot in life. If you think what I've just outlined is trivial, or unimportant, well my testicles would disagree with you vehemently. Many people would rank acceptance and companionship far ahead of money, so why no efforts to level the playing field in those area? The comeback to this is that I could hit the gym more often, eat better, become more interesting, etc. But that's like telling a non-rich person they could work harder and continue their education, that sounds like a lot of effort.
Maybe people are right, and making a few adjustments will make life easier for all the average people out there. That would be nice, but being people, they'd probably just find something new to bitch about. Not to mention those of us who don't put fiscal issues at the top of our list of inequities, what do we get out of this? The thing I want most in life is for the Vikings to win a Super Bowl, it's patently unfair that they haven't done so yet. I'm every bit the fan that any Patriot, Steeler or Packer fan is, yet they get titles and I just keep getting screwed.
I think the only fair solution is for Congress to pass a law, dictating that Aaron Rodgers play for the Vikings until they win it all. Only seems fair to me, after all, why should one team reap the benefits of having such a great players simply because they made a savvy decisions? The playing field isn't level, they've had the advantage of intelligent people running their teams, while we've been cursed with ineptitude. The only way to truly make things fair is to give the Vikings a mulligan on past decision making, take some stuff from the responsible teams out there and even this thing out. Seems like the moral thing to do if you ask me, people are suffering.
A football team may not rank with some of these issues in terms of importance (at least according to you), just drawing parallels to illustrate a point. No matter how well you do something, there will probably always be a million or so people who do it better, sad but true. They'll either have more skill, better opportunites, perhaps both; but just because they do it better, does not mean that you can't do it well, so why spend all your energy trying to take them down a peg?
The mantra of "Life isn't fair" is one that has been around since we were kids, stomping our feet and pouting because our brother got a new bike while we had to take his crappy old one. It's surprising that so many people seem to have forogotten it. You might think my examples are small potatoes compared to government issues, and you're right, but that all depends on the comparison being made. Get diagnosed with cancer and I'll bet life seems REALLY unfair, some guy paying 5% lower taxes probably seems about a consequential as a waitress screwing up your drink order.
But yet even those people soldier on, not worrying about placing blame, just doing what they need to do to survive. I know the motivation here is to fix the problem, but you're never going to "fix" this problem. The rich are smarter than us, they have more resources at their disposal and will always be one step ahead. I don't say this to tick anyone off, I'm right in that boat with you, just the reality of the situation.
Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, beyond that there are too many variables ensure everything works out fairly. If you're going to keep at it, try not to be so damn angry about it, the noble aspect is lost. Meanwhile, I'm getting gear up to work until the day I die and never see a dime of 30-40 years worth of Social Security contributions. Because when life isn't fair, you've gotta be realistic.
Of course I'll support any legislation that get us Rodgers.
In general, it seems like normal people are pissed off at rich people, and I suppose that I understand where that comes from. Sometimes it feels like the game is rigged, and watching some silver-spoon a-hole coast through life while the rest of us scratch out a living will tick you off. There are rules that probably need to be tweaked, and changes made, but in general it seems like some people need to be reminded of what their parents told them as kids: Life isn't fair.
We all have some stuff we get lucky with in life and some areas where we get screwed. I'm a reasonably healthy, somewhat intelligent man, blessed to have a solid upbringing that gave me opportunities in life. At the same time, there's that pesky genetic predisposition toward carrying a few extra pounds and having a head the size of a watermelon that I've had to overcome. Rich people presumably got to where they are due to some combination of good fortune and hardwork, if we're going to go after them, shouldn't I be able to even the playing field somehow between every guy out there who's better looking than me?
You'd probably scoff at the logic, but I think it's sound. Some guy hits the genetic lottery and ends up being able to attract women in any situation. Doesn't matter if he's got a G.E.D. and a string of illegitimate kids, he'll always do okay in that department. This guy didn't do anything in particular to deserve that, just had the good fortune with DNA. In order to make this situation more fair, shouldn't I be able to disfigure and/or otherwise do something to make him less attractive? After all, I'm struggling over here, need to level the playing field and give guys like me a chance to succeed. The attractive "rich" are pushing out middle class types.
Preposterous comparison? Perhaps, but it does illustrate that all sorts of chance occurrences are going to impact your lot in life. If you think what I've just outlined is trivial, or unimportant, well my testicles would disagree with you vehemently. Many people would rank acceptance and companionship far ahead of money, so why no efforts to level the playing field in those area? The comeback to this is that I could hit the gym more often, eat better, become more interesting, etc. But that's like telling a non-rich person they could work harder and continue their education, that sounds like a lot of effort.
Maybe people are right, and making a few adjustments will make life easier for all the average people out there. That would be nice, but being people, they'd probably just find something new to bitch about. Not to mention those of us who don't put fiscal issues at the top of our list of inequities, what do we get out of this? The thing I want most in life is for the Vikings to win a Super Bowl, it's patently unfair that they haven't done so yet. I'm every bit the fan that any Patriot, Steeler or Packer fan is, yet they get titles and I just keep getting screwed.
I think the only fair solution is for Congress to pass a law, dictating that Aaron Rodgers play for the Vikings until they win it all. Only seems fair to me, after all, why should one team reap the benefits of having such a great players simply because they made a savvy decisions? The playing field isn't level, they've had the advantage of intelligent people running their teams, while we've been cursed with ineptitude. The only way to truly make things fair is to give the Vikings a mulligan on past decision making, take some stuff from the responsible teams out there and even this thing out. Seems like the moral thing to do if you ask me, people are suffering.
A football team may not rank with some of these issues in terms of importance (at least according to you), just drawing parallels to illustrate a point. No matter how well you do something, there will probably always be a million or so people who do it better, sad but true. They'll either have more skill, better opportunites, perhaps both; but just because they do it better, does not mean that you can't do it well, so why spend all your energy trying to take them down a peg?
The mantra of "Life isn't fair" is one that has been around since we were kids, stomping our feet and pouting because our brother got a new bike while we had to take his crappy old one. It's surprising that so many people seem to have forogotten it. You might think my examples are small potatoes compared to government issues, and you're right, but that all depends on the comparison being made. Get diagnosed with cancer and I'll bet life seems REALLY unfair, some guy paying 5% lower taxes probably seems about a consequential as a waitress screwing up your drink order.
But yet even those people soldier on, not worrying about placing blame, just doing what they need to do to survive. I know the motivation here is to fix the problem, but you're never going to "fix" this problem. The rich are smarter than us, they have more resources at their disposal and will always be one step ahead. I don't say this to tick anyone off, I'm right in that boat with you, just the reality of the situation.
Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, beyond that there are too many variables ensure everything works out fairly. If you're going to keep at it, try not to be so damn angry about it, the noble aspect is lost. Meanwhile, I'm getting gear up to work until the day I die and never see a dime of 30-40 years worth of Social Security contributions. Because when life isn't fair, you've gotta be realistic.
Of course I'll support any legislation that get us Rodgers.
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Their way or the highway
It takes a special set of circumstances for a baseball team sitting 11 1/2 games back in it's division on August 15th to make national news. Something truly huge must happen, in the vein of a perfect game or bench-clearing brawl, to put something so irrelevant at center stage. The Twins had one of those rare occurrences last night, when Jim Thome smacked home runs #599 and #600, making him one of only 8 MLB players to accomplish that feat.
That was a nice moment for a guy who, by all accounts, is truly a class individual. It provided a great moment for his family, and offered the average Twins fan a nice distraction in the waning weeks of this lost season. But beyond getting a warm fuzzy for a few hours, there's not much meaning in those Thome moonshots. Sure they helped beat the Tigers, but anything done against Detroit at this late date will no doubt fall into the too little, too late category. The team is dead, and has been for awhile, now the last pleasant distraction has passed, and all we have to consider is a franchise coming off it's worst season in a very long time.
Pondering the future is what makes the other newsworthy move of yesterday, the trade of Delmon Young to the Tigers, stand out more in my mind than Thome's accomplishment. It would be ridiculous to put the two of them on par in terms of importance as players, and that's not my goal. I'm simply saying that Delmon's future is one we needed to be concerned about as Twins fans, whereas Thome's tale is probably coming to a close. As fun as his tenure was here, and as cool as it might've been to see the milestone reached in a Twins uniform, it's important to remember that Thome's record is a personal milestone. Keep in mind that far more of those 600 hurt us than helped us. Much like Mauer and Morneau's MVP awards, you can put a plaque on the wall and admire the individual performances, if that's your thing, but none of it brings the team any closer to a championship.
To be clear, I have no particular love for Delmon Young. Although I defend him during his time here, it was always driven by his youth, potential, and the hope that he would develop into a player who would help the ballclub. Not because I enjoy rooting for ballplayers who come off as aloof and disengaged, or because I enjoy watching left field being patrolled by a guy who ran like a horse on roller skates, but because he offered potential that just about every other young player in the organization lacked. Every fan had watched Delmon regress back into flailing incompetence this season, and every fan had read tales of his impersonal or standoffish interactions with coaches, nobody who follows this team would call themselves a "fan" of Delmon Young.
But that doesn't change the fact that this trade was poorly timed.
The Twins essentially got nothing in return for a guy who finished 10th in AL MVP balloting last season, and I'm still awaiting some sort of logic defending this move that I can agree with. The baseball media and bloggers in this town greeted the move witha parade of snark, quick to point out how flawed Delmon was as a player, and how much he would not be missed. Phil Mackey, who's work I enjoy, wrote a good piece illustrating the roller coaster that was DY, but it still leaves me cold. For all of the solid reasoning offered about why he'd probably never regain his 2010 form, or could not be counted on to live up to a big deal, I still have to ask, what was the harm in waiting?
Here we, with 6 weeks left in a lost season, everything that colud've gone wrong has gone wrong, the team is going nowhere, and it's time to start thinking about next year. I suppose that Young's presence in the lockerroom could've been so toxic that they felt they needed to move him on the spot, but if that was the case, why not a month ago? Predicting future value of baseball players is a tough job that I know little about, but I do know that in the general art of negotiation, limiting options is the best way to ensure you won't receive fair value. The Twins locked themselves into dealing with a single team by waiting until after the non-waiver trade deadline had passed, then compounded it by not pulling the player back and waiting until the offseason, when some other deal could've bee crafted without restriction.
I meant what did this guy do that he needed to be shipped out of town so fast, sleep with somebody's wife? If the Twins didn't want to pay him next season, then they could've let him walk, but I'd be willing to bet the offseason trade market would've delivered at least the same two mediocre relief pitchers that they got in return. Frankly I don't understand the logic of not giving it one more season with Young at $5 million, just to see if a contract year might help him recapture his motivation. Are there really so many great hitting options that are demanding to be played on the rest of this roster? In the minors? You don't have to look too far to find a Minnesota Twin who's significantly underperformed his contract this season, and several others don't have a season in their history that measures up to Delmon's 2010 campaign.
Which brings me to the general point, is the "Twins Way" of centering the team around low-key, high-character players limiting their thinking here? Meaning, did Delmon get traded simply because he was difficult to coach? Nobody would disagree with the thought of getting guys with good character on paper, but this is sports, and a lot of times the d-bags are the most talented guys in the room. Over six months and 162 games, it's easy to see how a grating personality could hurt clubhouse atmosphere. But it's equally easy to see how a lack of fire could lead to an environment in which personality trumps production.
It's true that there are not many concrete examples to offer, but the list of players who have anecdotally been tabbed as "not a good fit" grows ever longer. This season alone, I've heard it uttered regarding Orlando Cabrera, Matt Garza, Kevin Slowey, Orlando Hudson and several others. Now that's not a list of guys to lament losing, but some of them are solid major leaguers with successful careers. Toss in comments about coaching style from David Ortiz, among others, and it makes a guy wonder a bit about the priorities of the franchise.
Joe Mauer, Justin Morneau, Michael Cuddyer, all good players who seem like good guys, but nobody's going to confuse them with Earl Weaver when it comes to fiery motivation. For what it's worth, I'm probably a terrible judge of what would make for good atmosphere on a ballclub. After all, I'm just a reactionary fan, offering outside opinion without the perspective to back it up, and my bi-polar approach to things would probably burn everyone out by June.
But as a retort, I'll just say that this game takes all kinds, many organizations with many different philosohies and personality types have made their way into the winner's circle. History has proven the Twins approach to be effective, at least to a point, and piling on in a down season is not the goal here. I just can't help but think they got frustrated in this case, and let personal issues trump the business of baseball.
Say what you will about Delmon Young, but there can be no disputing that the man could hit a baseball. Maddeningly inconsistent as he might've been, selling at the lowest point possible is bad business. Acknowledging that there is probably more to the story, I just don't understand why this move had to be made now.
Cross your fingers that it doesn't come back to bite us in the ass.
That was a nice moment for a guy who, by all accounts, is truly a class individual. It provided a great moment for his family, and offered the average Twins fan a nice distraction in the waning weeks of this lost season. But beyond getting a warm fuzzy for a few hours, there's not much meaning in those Thome moonshots. Sure they helped beat the Tigers, but anything done against Detroit at this late date will no doubt fall into the too little, too late category. The team is dead, and has been for awhile, now the last pleasant distraction has passed, and all we have to consider is a franchise coming off it's worst season in a very long time.
Pondering the future is what makes the other newsworthy move of yesterday, the trade of Delmon Young to the Tigers, stand out more in my mind than Thome's accomplishment. It would be ridiculous to put the two of them on par in terms of importance as players, and that's not my goal. I'm simply saying that Delmon's future is one we needed to be concerned about as Twins fans, whereas Thome's tale is probably coming to a close. As fun as his tenure was here, and as cool as it might've been to see the milestone reached in a Twins uniform, it's important to remember that Thome's record is a personal milestone. Keep in mind that far more of those 600 hurt us than helped us. Much like Mauer and Morneau's MVP awards, you can put a plaque on the wall and admire the individual performances, if that's your thing, but none of it brings the team any closer to a championship.
To be clear, I have no particular love for Delmon Young. Although I defend him during his time here, it was always driven by his youth, potential, and the hope that he would develop into a player who would help the ballclub. Not because I enjoy rooting for ballplayers who come off as aloof and disengaged, or because I enjoy watching left field being patrolled by a guy who ran like a horse on roller skates, but because he offered potential that just about every other young player in the organization lacked. Every fan had watched Delmon regress back into flailing incompetence this season, and every fan had read tales of his impersonal or standoffish interactions with coaches, nobody who follows this team would call themselves a "fan" of Delmon Young.
But that doesn't change the fact that this trade was poorly timed.
The Twins essentially got nothing in return for a guy who finished 10th in AL MVP balloting last season, and I'm still awaiting some sort of logic defending this move that I can agree with. The baseball media and bloggers in this town greeted the move witha parade of snark, quick to point out how flawed Delmon was as a player, and how much he would not be missed. Phil Mackey, who's work I enjoy, wrote a good piece illustrating the roller coaster that was DY, but it still leaves me cold. For all of the solid reasoning offered about why he'd probably never regain his 2010 form, or could not be counted on to live up to a big deal, I still have to ask, what was the harm in waiting?
Here we, with 6 weeks left in a lost season, everything that colud've gone wrong has gone wrong, the team is going nowhere, and it's time to start thinking about next year. I suppose that Young's presence in the lockerroom could've been so toxic that they felt they needed to move him on the spot, but if that was the case, why not a month ago? Predicting future value of baseball players is a tough job that I know little about, but I do know that in the general art of negotiation, limiting options is the best way to ensure you won't receive fair value. The Twins locked themselves into dealing with a single team by waiting until after the non-waiver trade deadline had passed, then compounded it by not pulling the player back and waiting until the offseason, when some other deal could've bee crafted without restriction.
I meant what did this guy do that he needed to be shipped out of town so fast, sleep with somebody's wife? If the Twins didn't want to pay him next season, then they could've let him walk, but I'd be willing to bet the offseason trade market would've delivered at least the same two mediocre relief pitchers that they got in return. Frankly I don't understand the logic of not giving it one more season with Young at $5 million, just to see if a contract year might help him recapture his motivation. Are there really so many great hitting options that are demanding to be played on the rest of this roster? In the minors? You don't have to look too far to find a Minnesota Twin who's significantly underperformed his contract this season, and several others don't have a season in their history that measures up to Delmon's 2010 campaign.
Which brings me to the general point, is the "Twins Way" of centering the team around low-key, high-character players limiting their thinking here? Meaning, did Delmon get traded simply because he was difficult to coach? Nobody would disagree with the thought of getting guys with good character on paper, but this is sports, and a lot of times the d-bags are the most talented guys in the room. Over six months and 162 games, it's easy to see how a grating personality could hurt clubhouse atmosphere. But it's equally easy to see how a lack of fire could lead to an environment in which personality trumps production.
It's true that there are not many concrete examples to offer, but the list of players who have anecdotally been tabbed as "not a good fit" grows ever longer. This season alone, I've heard it uttered regarding Orlando Cabrera, Matt Garza, Kevin Slowey, Orlando Hudson and several others. Now that's not a list of guys to lament losing, but some of them are solid major leaguers with successful careers. Toss in comments about coaching style from David Ortiz, among others, and it makes a guy wonder a bit about the priorities of the franchise.
Joe Mauer, Justin Morneau, Michael Cuddyer, all good players who seem like good guys, but nobody's going to confuse them with Earl Weaver when it comes to fiery motivation. For what it's worth, I'm probably a terrible judge of what would make for good atmosphere on a ballclub. After all, I'm just a reactionary fan, offering outside opinion without the perspective to back it up, and my bi-polar approach to things would probably burn everyone out by June.
But as a retort, I'll just say that this game takes all kinds, many organizations with many different philosohies and personality types have made their way into the winner's circle. History has proven the Twins approach to be effective, at least to a point, and piling on in a down season is not the goal here. I just can't help but think they got frustrated in this case, and let personal issues trump the business of baseball.
Say what you will about Delmon Young, but there can be no disputing that the man could hit a baseball. Maddeningly inconsistent as he might've been, selling at the lowest point possible is bad business. Acknowledging that there is probably more to the story, I just don't understand why this move had to be made now.
Cross your fingers that it doesn't come back to bite us in the ass.
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Lost in transition
Is there anything worse than the excruciating wait for something you're really looking forward to? Leaving for a week's vacation on Friday always seems to make the week crawl along at an interminably slow pace. This is where I'm currently at with the football season, while the end of the lockout and tidal wave of player movement have certainly been nice, there's still a month to wait before the games that count actually start...and it's going to be a slow one. Sure you could look to areas outside sports for distractions, but do you really need to be reminded that the current balance of your 401k is approximately equivalent to a cup of coffee? I thought not.
Many writers out there seem to be dealing with this year's August lull by wondering what might've been if changes were made to sports history. Locally, Michael Rand of the Star Tribune has been re-visiting some of the more painful losses in Twins and Vikings history, wondering how history might've unfolded differently had they gone the other direction. On a national level, SI's Joe Posnanski unveiled the concept of Sports Code, a take off on the file "Source Code", and it's notion that while you can't directly change events, you can attempt to change the circumstances surrounding them, and let the chips fall where they may from there.
Posnanski explains:
There are only two conditions that I just invented for Sports Code.
(1) You can’t change a sporting RESULT. That is to say, you can’t go back and have Scott Norwood MAKE the field goal or have Michael Jordan MISS the jumper or have that Butler kid make the halfcourt shot. You cannot make Bill Buckner field the ground ball cleanly (though you could try to convince Red Sox manager John McNamara to put in Dave Stapleton as a defensive replacement). Those are results, and they happened, and they cannot be changed (in my completely made-up scenario). No, you can only change something tangible, something that might make a difference ...
(2) You can’t go back and create a whole new ending. That’s a slightly tricky concept, but here’s what I mean: For it to be a true Sports Code moment, you need to leave the ending open-ended. So, as much as you might want to do this, you can’t have Jim Joyce make the right call so that Armando Galarraga gets his perfect game. Because, in that case, he GETS THE PERFECT GAME, and the story is over. That’s a closed ending. The point here is to change something and then let a new ending unfold naturally.
As a serial lamenter of what might've been, this concept intrigued me, and when a friend called my attention to the article last week, I had to ask the question: What would comprise my Minnesota Sports Code Top 5?
About a year-and-a-half ago, on the heels of the most recent Vikings debacle, I was compelled to put together the Minnesota sports Hall of Pain, and that's where most of my inspiration is drawn from. The first two items, in fact, have to do with the two games Rand chose to wonder about:
1. Tell Denny Green to stay aggressive
No one could say for sure what would've happened in the 1998 NFC Championship game had the Vikings put the pedal down and attempted to bury the Falcons with their prolific offense...but we do know for sure what going the conservative route got us. All season long, a record-setting offense had covered up flaws in a mediocre defense by getting up big and making opponents react. The kneel down at half was just one example the could be found of a wide-open gameplan turning conservative overnight. They should've continued to adhere to the Randy Moss matra of "just chuck it deep dawg", instead the offensive coaches Schottenheimered the s*it out of it. Somebody needed to remind Denny that playing not to lose is for losers.
2. Tell Gardy to pull Joe Nathan
Sure the guy was a fantastic pitcher, but you're going to throw him out there against the heart of the best order in baseball for a third inning in a huge postseason game? I can remember being surprised at the time. Then enraged, followed by disappointed, hopeful and ultimately despondent. Throw in the Hunter home run that gave us the lead in the top of the inning, and it was one of the quickest emotional rollercoasters on record. Ahhh, those were the days, back when postseason failures in New York had the potential to wound.
A couple others have to do with draft day dealings:
3. Tell Kevin McHale not to swap Ray Allen for Stephon Marbury
For my money, the greatest sports "what-if" in this town during my life time. A 1-2 punch of Kevin Garnett and Allen would've created the makings for decade's worth of perennial contenders, not alienated Tom Gugliotta and completely changed the course of a historically awful franchise. On a related note, if someone put a red button in front of me right now, and told me that if I pushed it, Stephon Marbury would drop dead, I can honestly say that I would not. I can also honestly say that from 1999-2001, there was approximately an 80% chance that I would've pushed that button.
4. Tell Mike Nolan to draft Aaron Rodgers
This wouldn't have done a thing to help my team, but it would have prevented Rodgers of landing in Green Bay and becoming the phenomenal quarterback that he is. Watching this whole thing unfold has been like a bad dream for Vikings fans, who didn't even have time to celebrate the end of the Favre Era before a new QB who might end up being even better came along. Aaron Rodgers seems like a decent dude, I wish no particular ill on the man, but why the hell did he have to end up with the Packers? Ghandi must've had a cheesehead, and Hitler some Helga horns, given the karma at work here.
And finally, the current great "what-if" on our local sports scene, appropos to the last couple nights of baseball:
5. Tell the Twins to take the Red Sox trade offer for Johan Santana
With the Red Sox in town this week, we've already gotten a good look at CF Jacoby Ellsbury, who's in the running for AL MVP this season. Tonight, their elite lefty Jon Lester will take the mound, looking to finish off the series sweep. During the Santana sweepstakes, it was widely reported that a sticking point for the Twins was the inclusion of both of these players in the Red Sox offer. Boston, quite astutely as it turned out, would only include one, which ultimately scuttled the deal. 3 1/2 years later, offering the package of four players the Twins ultimately ended up receiving from the Mets for either one of these BoSox stars would get you laughed out of the room at best, committed at worst. Three of the four "prospects" Minnesota received are now gone from the organization, with the fourth, Delois Guerra, not exactly knocking down the door to the majors. Sure, Carlos Gomez had a few fun moments here, and brief flashes of potential, but ultimately the greatest benefit realize from dealing the best pitcher in the game was one season of J.J. Hardy and Jon Rauch. Be still my heart.
And if all that doesn't have you significantly depressed, it's probably time to refill the prescription.
Many writers out there seem to be dealing with this year's August lull by wondering what might've been if changes were made to sports history. Locally, Michael Rand of the Star Tribune has been re-visiting some of the more painful losses in Twins and Vikings history, wondering how history might've unfolded differently had they gone the other direction. On a national level, SI's Joe Posnanski unveiled the concept of Sports Code, a take off on the file "Source Code", and it's notion that while you can't directly change events, you can attempt to change the circumstances surrounding them, and let the chips fall where they may from there.
Posnanski explains:
There are only two conditions that I just invented for Sports Code.
(1) You can’t change a sporting RESULT. That is to say, you can’t go back and have Scott Norwood MAKE the field goal or have Michael Jordan MISS the jumper or have that Butler kid make the halfcourt shot. You cannot make Bill Buckner field the ground ball cleanly (though you could try to convince Red Sox manager John McNamara to put in Dave Stapleton as a defensive replacement). Those are results, and they happened, and they cannot be changed (in my completely made-up scenario). No, you can only change something tangible, something that might make a difference ...
(2) You can’t go back and create a whole new ending. That’s a slightly tricky concept, but here’s what I mean: For it to be a true Sports Code moment, you need to leave the ending open-ended. So, as much as you might want to do this, you can’t have Jim Joyce make the right call so that Armando Galarraga gets his perfect game. Because, in that case, he GETS THE PERFECT GAME, and the story is over. That’s a closed ending. The point here is to change something and then let a new ending unfold naturally.
As a serial lamenter of what might've been, this concept intrigued me, and when a friend called my attention to the article last week, I had to ask the question: What would comprise my Minnesota Sports Code Top 5?
About a year-and-a-half ago, on the heels of the most recent Vikings debacle, I was compelled to put together the Minnesota sports Hall of Pain, and that's where most of my inspiration is drawn from. The first two items, in fact, have to do with the two games Rand chose to wonder about:
1. Tell Denny Green to stay aggressive
No one could say for sure what would've happened in the 1998 NFC Championship game had the Vikings put the pedal down and attempted to bury the Falcons with their prolific offense...but we do know for sure what going the conservative route got us. All season long, a record-setting offense had covered up flaws in a mediocre defense by getting up big and making opponents react. The kneel down at half was just one example the could be found of a wide-open gameplan turning conservative overnight. They should've continued to adhere to the Randy Moss matra of "just chuck it deep dawg", instead the offensive coaches Schottenheimered the s*it out of it. Somebody needed to remind Denny that playing not to lose is for losers.
2. Tell Gardy to pull Joe Nathan
Sure the guy was a fantastic pitcher, but you're going to throw him out there against the heart of the best order in baseball for a third inning in a huge postseason game? I can remember being surprised at the time. Then enraged, followed by disappointed, hopeful and ultimately despondent. Throw in the Hunter home run that gave us the lead in the top of the inning, and it was one of the quickest emotional rollercoasters on record. Ahhh, those were the days, back when postseason failures in New York had the potential to wound.
A couple others have to do with draft day dealings:
3. Tell Kevin McHale not to swap Ray Allen for Stephon Marbury
For my money, the greatest sports "what-if" in this town during my life time. A 1-2 punch of Kevin Garnett and Allen would've created the makings for decade's worth of perennial contenders, not alienated Tom Gugliotta and completely changed the course of a historically awful franchise. On a related note, if someone put a red button in front of me right now, and told me that if I pushed it, Stephon Marbury would drop dead, I can honestly say that I would not. I can also honestly say that from 1999-2001, there was approximately an 80% chance that I would've pushed that button.
4. Tell Mike Nolan to draft Aaron Rodgers
This wouldn't have done a thing to help my team, but it would have prevented Rodgers of landing in Green Bay and becoming the phenomenal quarterback that he is. Watching this whole thing unfold has been like a bad dream for Vikings fans, who didn't even have time to celebrate the end of the Favre Era before a new QB who might end up being even better came along. Aaron Rodgers seems like a decent dude, I wish no particular ill on the man, but why the hell did he have to end up with the Packers? Ghandi must've had a cheesehead, and Hitler some Helga horns, given the karma at work here.
And finally, the current great "what-if" on our local sports scene, appropos to the last couple nights of baseball:
5. Tell the Twins to take the Red Sox trade offer for Johan Santana
With the Red Sox in town this week, we've already gotten a good look at CF Jacoby Ellsbury, who's in the running for AL MVP this season. Tonight, their elite lefty Jon Lester will take the mound, looking to finish off the series sweep. During the Santana sweepstakes, it was widely reported that a sticking point for the Twins was the inclusion of both of these players in the Red Sox offer. Boston, quite astutely as it turned out, would only include one, which ultimately scuttled the deal. 3 1/2 years later, offering the package of four players the Twins ultimately ended up receiving from the Mets for either one of these BoSox stars would get you laughed out of the room at best, committed at worst. Three of the four "prospects" Minnesota received are now gone from the organization, with the fourth, Delois Guerra, not exactly knocking down the door to the majors. Sure, Carlos Gomez had a few fun moments here, and brief flashes of potential, but ultimately the greatest benefit realize from dealing the best pitcher in the game was one season of J.J. Hardy and Jon Rauch. Be still my heart.
And if all that doesn't have you significantly depressed, it's probably time to refill the prescription.
Monday, August 8, 2011
Downside risk
What the heck is going on here? I leave the country for a few days and all hell breaks loose.
Last Wednesday I crossed the border into Canada for a few days of fishing. At the time the Twins still had a pulse (admittedly a very faint one), the United States a AAA credit rating and the Dow was above 12,000. Now the baseball team has had it's final coffin nail pounded, treasury bonds are about as reliable as the Seahawks QB situation and the economy is a shambles. But hey, you still had a better weekend than Rhett Bomar.
A weekend of fishing, drinking and, most importantly card playing, reminded me once again of the power of expectations. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, bad results can be good, and good results bad, depending on what you were expecting going in. Many games of cribbage were played during the past few days, at $5 a pop. For those of you unfamiliar with the scoring, a game goes to 120 points, if you fail to score 90, the amount you owe is doubled, and failing to reach 60 points means a $15 hit. Several games started off extremely poorly, raising the spectre of doubling or tripling the amount lost. When that occurred, I was quite happy to make a late push past 90, losing big, but still only losing the $5 minimum. Naturally, this made me think of Tim Brewster, the all-time king of meaningless late scores to make ugly losses more palatable.
Brew was a perfect example of what happens when you serve hambugers after telling people they're going to get filet mignon Said burgers might be tasty enough to a starving man (read: Gopher football fan), but will always end in disappointment when steak was on the menu. As we close the book on our high-expectations squad (Twins), in favor of a couple who's bar will be decidedly lower (Vikings, Gophers), I'm reminded that it's not always bad to be bad. Sure there are a few consistent homers out there trying to push the best case scenario, but in general things are nice and calm. The bandwagon is emptier these days, but the company is better and you can stretch out a bit. Teams in rebuilding mode cause you to accentuate the positive, seeing something done right is a refreshing change from the standard rule of failure. Teams with championship aspirations draw more eyes, and the associated scrutiny, with every misstep being picked apart until you're not even sure if your good team is good anymore.
In a broader context, take the recent economy. People get upset about the stock market dropping because it harms their wealth, and likely causes concerns about their retirement. But if you recalibrate your expectations, and simply assume you'll be working until the day you drop dead, then a 20% drop in your 401k isn't really a big deal. Marketing research shows that people respond more favorably to the removal of negative stimuli than they do to the introduction of a positive one. In other words, they're more likely to buy a $90 item that you tell them will be going up $10 in the near future than a $100 item on sale for $10 off. The price may be the same, but the expectations drive different behavior. The expect failure, deal with success mantra can sometimes be the best way to approach life.
In other words, the Vikings are going to lose $5 this season, but maybe, if they're lucky, they can avoid dropping $10 or $15.
And with that thought, Happy Monday :)
Last Wednesday I crossed the border into Canada for a few days of fishing. At the time the Twins still had a pulse (admittedly a very faint one), the United States a AAA credit rating and the Dow was above 12,000. Now the baseball team has had it's final coffin nail pounded, treasury bonds are about as reliable as the Seahawks QB situation and the economy is a shambles. But hey, you still had a better weekend than Rhett Bomar.
A weekend of fishing, drinking and, most importantly card playing, reminded me once again of the power of expectations. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, bad results can be good, and good results bad, depending on what you were expecting going in. Many games of cribbage were played during the past few days, at $5 a pop. For those of you unfamiliar with the scoring, a game goes to 120 points, if you fail to score 90, the amount you owe is doubled, and failing to reach 60 points means a $15 hit. Several games started off extremely poorly, raising the spectre of doubling or tripling the amount lost. When that occurred, I was quite happy to make a late push past 90, losing big, but still only losing the $5 minimum. Naturally, this made me think of Tim Brewster, the all-time king of meaningless late scores to make ugly losses more palatable.
Brew was a perfect example of what happens when you serve hambugers after telling people they're going to get filet mignon Said burgers might be tasty enough to a starving man (read: Gopher football fan), but will always end in disappointment when steak was on the menu. As we close the book on our high-expectations squad (Twins), in favor of a couple who's bar will be decidedly lower (Vikings, Gophers), I'm reminded that it's not always bad to be bad. Sure there are a few consistent homers out there trying to push the best case scenario, but in general things are nice and calm. The bandwagon is emptier these days, but the company is better and you can stretch out a bit. Teams in rebuilding mode cause you to accentuate the positive, seeing something done right is a refreshing change from the standard rule of failure. Teams with championship aspirations draw more eyes, and the associated scrutiny, with every misstep being picked apart until you're not even sure if your good team is good anymore.
In a broader context, take the recent economy. People get upset about the stock market dropping because it harms their wealth, and likely causes concerns about their retirement. But if you recalibrate your expectations, and simply assume you'll be working until the day you drop dead, then a 20% drop in your 401k isn't really a big deal. Marketing research shows that people respond more favorably to the removal of negative stimuli than they do to the introduction of a positive one. In other words, they're more likely to buy a $90 item that you tell them will be going up $10 in the near future than a $100 item on sale for $10 off. The price may be the same, but the expectations drive different behavior. The expect failure, deal with success mantra can sometimes be the best way to approach life.
In other words, the Vikings are going to lose $5 this season, but maybe, if they're lucky, they can avoid dropping $10 or $15.
And with that thought, Happy Monday :)
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